ITT: Times nature has decided to fuck with you.
>Be Ausfag
>A week ago
>walking a trail down to the bottom of a waterfall
>enjoying myself immensely
>as I'm leaving I notice a bite from either a large spider or a small snake on my right hand
>Get home feeling fine, later have a pretty bad fever
>fine the next day
>be yesterday
>walking home from uni
>something lands on my head
>think it's a leaf, brush it off
>something stings my left hand
>can't find any trace of what did it
>finger swells but no big deal
>later that day I put on the jumper I was wearing while in my bedroom
>get stung 3 times just under my armpit
>maximum_over_rage.exe
>throw off my jumper to find a motherfucking paperwasp (I think, not quite sure) inside.
>pin it down to my bed with a box, decapitate it and put the body in the toilet so I may urinate on it. The head is watching the whole time
>satisfaction

So I went 21 years without anything more than a bee sting to being bitten by a spider or a snake and wrecked by a wasp in the safety of my own home in the space of a week.

>pic related, looks like what stung me