I can't start a proper fire for the life of me. I've gathered the driest crunchiest wood I can find, and none of it will light. I've tried using dry leaves, paper, and drier lint to get it started, but the wood just won't catch. I've even tried using a propane torch, and I can't even get small dry twigs to lite, much less whole logs.

Those of you that are more skilled in this field, what's your usual process for getting a good fire going? Do you have any tips/advice for anyone as outrageously inexperienced and incompetent as I am?