/out/ - Outdoors » Thread #2587543

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Anonymous Fri 26 May 2023 11:39:05 No.2587543 View View Reply Original Report

Quoted By: >>2587549 >>2587565 >>2587629 >>2587873 >>2588424 >>2588629

Your balloon have just crashed somewhere deep in the North pole.
How do you unfuck yourself?

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 26 May 2023 11:49:15 No.2587549 Report

Quoted By: >>2588520 >>2588630

>>2587543
>salvage the balloon material
>gather cordage
>saddle a polar bear
>ride it south
You’re probably wondering how I would manage to subdue a bear. Well, as it turns out, to tame a wild polar bear enough to saddle it like a domesticated animal, all you have to do is show it your penis. Arctic animals are very self conscious about their size, and if yours is bigger, it completely breaks their spirit. Google some key terms like “riding bear dick” if you don’t believe. There are plenty of videos out there.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 26 May 2023 12:50:11 No.2587565 Report

Quoted By:

>>2587543
>1. Drink my pee
>2. Set fire to balloon
>3. Club a baby seal
>4. Take a drag off the smokes I brought
>5. Fire into the air 3 times every hour

Be an awesome few days before death.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 26 May 2023 15:17:28 No.2587629 Report

Quoted By: >>2588264

>>2587543
The first step is to gather rocks and branches to build a stone pickaxe.
Then mine ore, create an iron smelter, and unlock "Mechanics I"
Craft gears to build steam engine and unlock "Simple Vehicle I"
Throw a few branches into the boiler and you're cruising in style.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 27 May 2023 00:56:37 No.2587873 Report

Quoted By:

>>2587543
>pull out deck of card
>lay out a solitaire in the snow
>start playing...
>feel tapping on my shoulder
>*stranger clears throath and point* jack of spades on queen of hearts...
>ask that guy for directions before he leaves

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 27 May 2023 14:55:23 No.2588031 Report

Quoted By:

i get your sister to blow it back up, like she was blowing my penis the other day, anon.
hope this helps

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 27 May 2023 22:03:11 No.2588264 Report

Quoted By:

>>2587629
I hate it when my friends and I go out and there's always those two or three guys who tech up from a couple of rocks and logs to semiconducting materials in like four hours. I can never get past steelmaking unless it's a long weekend and we're doing an overnight. Fuck, one time I took a girl I was into and she ended up getting sat-comms while I was in the bronze age stuff. She ended up hooking up with one of my friends who could solve trig equations with a bamboo slide rule. Embarrassing to say the least.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 28 May 2023 04:17:22 No.2588424 Report

Quoted By: >>2591315

>>2587543
I stay

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 28 May 2023 09:41:02 No.2588520 Report

Quoted By:

>>2587549
real

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 28 May 2023 14:11:37 No.2588629 Report

Quoted By:

>>2587543
Step one: kill the oldest polar bear in the world and discover how hard meat can be.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 28 May 2023 14:13:10 No.2588630 Report

Quoted By:

>>2587549
Step one: kill the oldest polar bear in the world and discover how hard meat can be.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 28 May 2023 17:26:03 No.2588703 Report

Quoted By:

This thread is arctic recon gold

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 28 May 2023 21:18:04 No.2588844 Report

Quoted By:

jump off the edge

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 01 Jun 2023 13:42:43 No.2590696 Report

Quoted By:

Setting the balloon on fire is unironically one of your better options, just pray somebody notices the smoke and decides to investigate

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 02 Jun 2023 19:14:44 No.2591315 Report

Quoted By: >>2591344

>>2588424
She cute

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 02 Jun 2023 20:26:12 No.2591344 Report

Quoted By:

>>2591315
I like that she like someone draw on her face. That is something I have wanted to do to a number of women.

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