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Natural instincts thread?

No.2764948 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
Thread for stories of natural instict saving from trouble
I'll begin
>Be me
>Want to see stars
>Get soviet military tent cloak, soviet military kettle, five liters of water, a foam mat and a bunch of salted lard.
>Hop on my bike and head out
>Drive on the highway, nearly get hit by several cars
>Water jug breaks off the bike, falls down
>Fall off the bike
>Put jug into backpack, continue riding
>Turn to the dirt road towards fields and villages
>Already evening
>Make a few turns to really get into the fields
>Finally arrive
>A bunch of wild steppe-like grassland just sitting in a large hilly area between two large forests
>Grass yellow and dry
>Looks like africa
>Take firewood from nearby abandoned graveyard
>Bike through the grassland to reach a more remote area
>Find a noice valley between two hills
>Flip up bike, wrap it in the tent cloak to make sun shield
>Ground is coarse as hell, even my well-conditioned feet hurt a bit
>Decide to flip the dirt on the sleeping area to make it softer
>O shit oh no
>Forgot shovel again, like a retard
>Try digging with a sharp stick
>Only manage to dig a little roudnd pit
>Not good enough for campfire(not intending to start a wildfire)
>Feel the urges of the bowels
>Piss and shit in the hole
>Lay the matress over some dry plants
>Lie down on it
>Fall asleep and lie there for two hours
>Have weird dreams about being insulted by women
>Wake up
>Shit in in the hole and piss there again
>Chug 3 liters of water
>Suddenly become nervous
>Feel anxiety, as if something bad is going to happen
>Can't bear with it anymore
>Pack up, drink the remaining two liters of water
>Draw a giant swastika on the ground, write my name and a bunch of smaller swastikas
>Sit on the bike and start getting the hell out of here
>Feel adrenaline rush and bowel unrest at same time
>Pick up even more speed
>Get home quickly
>Rain starts immediatly, the thunder
>It's a rainstorm
Ancestral instinct saved me from this one.