/out/ - Outdoors » Thread #494560

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Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 02:38:48 No.494560 View View Reply Original Report

Quoted By: >>494564 >>494567 >>494585 >>494797 >>495007 >>496867 >>497552 >>500057 >>500375 >>502934 >>504388 >>508446 >>513364 >>514042 >>514069 >>514932

What is your preferred method for taking a shit when innawoods?
describe in detail.
we can rate eachothers techniques out of 10.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 02:43:35 No.494564 Report

Quoted By: >>494575 >>497439 >>497536 >>497987 >>500369 >>503021

>>494560
If theres a stream or river close by, do it right in there. Otherwise I shit in my cookpot in my tent and hoy it out of the door.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 02:44:51 No.494566 Report

Quoted By: >>506314 >>508586 >>512911

I prefer off a cliff face using a rope to hold me in for the ride. The mountain air wicking my asshole as I take a high pressure shit from the alcohol and MREs of the couple nights before is damn soothing.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 02:46:59 No.494567 Report

Quoted By: >>494670

>>494560
>not eating your shit
>wasting that precious excess protein and carbs

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 02:48:05 No.494569 Report

Quoted By: >>494573 >>496839

I used to survey and took all my shits in the forest for 4 months. I would typically find a nice log to lean against and shit. One time I was in a stand with lots of windthrow and I climbed up and took a shit sitting on a fallen tree from about 12 feet up. This was 5 years ago and I'll always remember that glorious shit.

Other people typically squatted and held a small tree in front of them. I never really did this, I was and still am a log man.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 02:49:48 No.494571 Report

Quoted By: >>496967 >>497424

i shit in the middle of the trail, and then cover it with couple of leaves so it's not easy to spot.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 02:50:53 No.494573 Report

Quoted By: >>494574 >>497968

>>494569
For some reason I read that as you found a hollow tree, sat on the top, and shit down the tube like I giant chimney.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 03:03:45 No.494574 Report

Quoted By:

>>494573
That would be awesome but no, it was a spot rife with Armillaria root rot and the trees fell over in criss-cross patterns so you could climb up them like a ladder.

sycadelic

sycadelic Fri 10 Apr 2015 03:07:08 No.494575 Report

Quoted By:

>>494564
Please.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 03:10:12 No.494578 Report

Quoted By: >>500283

I like to go far off the beaten path, strip naked and squat. I get some leaves and wipe and continue with my day

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 03:36:58 No.494585 Report

Quoted By: >>502904

>>494560
Dig a small hole and slav squat over it, enjoy glorious shit using this recommended posture, cover hole with dirt and continue on my way.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 06:57:41 No.494659 Report

Quoted By: >>494683 >>496840 >>501272 >>506215 >>508452 >>512122

Since I always eat a huge meal before I go out on my first day I will always be compelled to take a monster dump, here is my ritual.

I take a condom and fill it part way with water, pinch it off then walk to a nearby tree. Holding the condom with water gently in my teeth, i rip down my pants to my ankles and get into this position (see image).

After about 5 minutes of solid squeezing wheezing and grunting, I flip over to one side and stand up. At this moment I place and hold sealed the condom half filled with water over my exposed rectum and begin to hop around the forest - pants around ankles, one hand cupped around my balls, one around my anus as the water from the condom gently douches and massages away my poopy bottom.

After another 5mins the condom is now filled with a mysterious murky brown fluid with some solid particulates, I air dry my moist pink booty chutey, tie the condom off and throw it at a squirrel or bird and go along my merry way.

It is important to remember that you own nature and she is your bitch. My poop ritual helps me display my dominance and I never have to lower myself to pleb leaf wipe status.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 08:10:17 No.494670 Report

Quoted By:

>>494567

Copro makes gainz?

TheArborist !!6EWSCPNzHJp

TheArborist !!6EWSCPNzHJp Fri 10 Apr 2015 09:20:56 No.494683 Report

Quoted By:

>>494659

> throw condom full of water and poo at a bird or squirrel

Inappropriate amount of laughter achieved.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 14:57:55 No.494780 Report

Quoted By: >>502905

>not hiking with Cabelas brand adult diapers

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 15:27:43 No.494797 Report

Quoted By:

>>494560
Drop trow
Point ass over clifface
Build pressure
Let Fly All Guns!
People below scream
They kiss their children goodbye
Missile inbound
Hope is lost

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 15:56:16 No.494809 Report

Quoted By: >>494982 >>495009 >>499649 >>514325

>Tfw hairy ass

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 21:45:33 No.494982 Report

Quoted By: >>495009 >>508314

>>494809
As a fellow hairy-assed hiker on the /out/ism spectrum, I recommend the application of a little cornstarch and talcum powder to your cheeks every few days. It helps keep things from sticking.

Put some on your balls, too. Keeps you from getting swamp crotch in the summer.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO shitter chair.jpg, 69KiB, 500x375

Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 22:13:55 No.495007 Report

Quoted By: >>496861 >>497495 >>503786

>>494560

Grab shitter chair, shovel, toilet paper, cigarette and a lighter
Find a secluded shady spot well away from camp (100+ yards)
Carefully use shovel to cut out a chunk of sod and set it aside
Dig out the hole about a foot or so deep, setting the dirt aside in a pile
Place shitter chair over hole
Light a cigarette and stick it in the ground at a 45* angle at the back edge of the hole
Take a shit
Knock cigarette into shithole and shovel dirt back in
Carefully drop chunk of sod right-side-up into shithole, press down with shovel
Kick some twigs and leaves around to make the spot look natural
stroll back to camp

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 22:14:55 No.495009 Report

Quoted By: >>495013

>>494809
>>494982

Cut that shit, the fuck are you putting powder on your asshole for? You don't need to live like that.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 10 Apr 2015 22:21:15 No.495013 Report

Quoted By: >>495019 >>514325

>>495009
>Cut that shit

Once you start shaving that shit, it'll grow back even hairier.

TheArborist !!6EWSCPNzHJp

TheArborist !!6EWSCPNzHJp Fri 10 Apr 2015 22:29:42 No.495019 Report

Quoted By: >>497179 >>500818 >>501290 >>514325

>>495013

That's not how hair works Anon.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 13 Apr 2015 23:21:24 No.496817 Report

Quoted By: >>496819

One of the best outdoor workouts imo.

Bonus points if you can do pushups while wiping.

People usually dont mind seeing me when I'm not wearing my homemade shaman gear.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 13 Apr 2015 23:22:26 No.496819 Report

Quoted By:

>>496817
>trying this hard

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 13 Apr 2015 23:47:22 No.496839 Report

Quoted By:

>>494569

this. either log method, or cathole and hug a tree.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 13 Apr 2015 23:48:33 No.496840 Report

Quoted By: >>512255

>>494659

so much typing, so little laughter.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 00:34:00 No.496861 Report

Quoted By: >>496936

>>495007
What's the cigarette for? "Air freshener"?

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 00:44:00 No.496867 Report

Quoted By: >>497175

>>494560

Unzip tent, stick my butt out through the opening, then fuckin' freeblast it. Go for distance, you don't wanna be smelling that right outside all night

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO poop.jpg, 292KiB, 1024x768

Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 00:55:49 No.496878 Report

Quoted By: >>497821

>have to take very urgent morning dump
>get out of bag
>find spot to shit
>start digging
>have to go badly
>trying to dig, but ground is hard w/rocks
>break orange plastic shovel
>fuck
>poop without hole
Never again
Heavy metal shovel ever since
Fuck the weight
pic related

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 02:14:41 No.496936 Report

Quoted By: >>497009

>>496861
>What's the cigarette for? "Air freshener"?

To keep bugs away from your exposed ass when you're in an awkward position.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 02:57:29 No.496967 Report

Quoted By:

>>494571

Made me laugh

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 04:09:46 No.497009 Report

Quoted By:

>>496936
Hmmm, never thought of that. A morning cigarette has always worked well for getting my post wake up shit going. Smoking might kill you but everything's good for some thing.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 13:01:10 No.497175 Report

Quoted By:

>>496867
>freeblast

Holy fuck that was great

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 13:06:26 No.497179 Report

Quoted By: >>497181

>>495019
he is right thou. i was a retard as a teenager and always shaved the hair around my nipples and chest, now im yeti

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 13:09:01 No.497181 Report

Quoted By: >>499423

>>497179
That's because you're just hairy. Has nothing to do with shaving. When I was in high school I had barely any chest hair, by age 25 I was a man beast covered in chest hair. Never shaved it.

Read up on it, shaving doesn't make it thicker.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 13:14:05 No.497184 Report

Quoted By:

Me innawoods

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO shitting.png, 18KiB, 508x456

Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 21:24:38 No.497421 Report

Quoted By: >>497532 >>500017 >>508446

I generally do some variation on the following, depending on what kinds of rocks/logs are available. If there is a smooth horizontal log at a good height to sit on, then I will lean my ass up against that. However, generally, I just find a rock or log and lean on it with my hand. The important thing is to walk far enough away from your campsite, the trail, and water sources that no one is likely to stumble upon your shit by accident.

I do not dig a cathole unless I am camping in a high-use area. Burying your feces actually prolongs the time it takes for your shit and the toilet paper to decompose, and thus is purely a sanitation issue. Exposed to the air, shit only takes a month or so before it's completely gone. Toilet paper takes a bit longer to decompose, around 1-2 years especially if the environment is particularly dry or cold, but after being exposed to the rain, your shit will wash off of it, and it will sterilize to become harmless, clean toilet paper. However, the bottom line is that it does decompose quicker when exposed to the air. I generally put a few rocks or logs over the whole mess so it's less of an eyesore.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 21:31:14 No.497424 Report

Quoted By:

>>494571
i'm going to do this from now on.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 21:42:51 No.497427 Report

Quoted By:

>be on a boat on lake
>pull into shore for lunch
>gotta blast a Doogie
>walk into woods away from everyone
>gotta drop a mud monkey pretty bad now
>find suitable pooping tree
>it's like perfectly designed for pooping
>can't belive my luck
>walk around tree to optimum poop spot
>mfw there's a fresh pile of man poo already there
>go drop my golden butt mud on a less optimum tree
>walk back to shore
>find out my cousin had to poo minutes before me and snuck off secretly
>he did the whole poo black ops style no one saw him go in or out
>except my poo detective skills solved the crappy mystery
>I'm 30 years olf, I don't care who knows I shit in the woods
>he's 18, super embarrassed I announced to the world he pooped in the woods
>me feeling smug

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 21:50:31 No.497431 Report

Quoted By: >>497728 >>498059 >>502963 >>503021 >>511675

>be on a boat on lake
>pull into shore for lunch
>gotta blast a Dookie
>walk into woods away from everyone
>gotta drop a mud monkey pretty bad now
>find suitable pooping tree
>it's like perfectly designed for pooping
>can't belive my luck
>walk around tree to optimum poop spot
>mfw there's a fresh pile of man poo already there
>I'm the only one around
>in national forest, miles from roads
>who is this pooping bandit who stole my spot
>go drop my golden butt mud on a less optimum tree
>walk back to shore
>announce to everyone I know someone has a secret and they're going to fess up
>who dropped that fresh steamy man manure in the woods
>I'm relentless
>younger cousin finally confesses
>find out my cousin had to poo minutes before me and snuck off secretly
>he did the whole poo black ops style no one saw him go in or out
>except my poo detective skills solved the crappy mystery
>I'm 30 years old, I don't care who knows I shit in the woods
>he's 18, super embarrassed I announced to the world he pooped in the woods
>compliment young poo apprentice on excellent choice of tree to blast shit on

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 22:01:20 No.497437 Report

Quoted By:

Since my innawoods area is dotted with small hills i find a nice hill, slav squat on it, grab a tree, push hard and let it roll down the hill. Stand up, wipe, inhale fresh air

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 22:10:49 No.497439 Report

Quoted By: >>497555

>>494564
>/out/ has learned not to take the bait!
/out/ really is best board.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 22:48:32 No.497458 Report

Quoted By: >>497461

Why do you guys rest your hand/back on a log or rock? What happens if you just squat like a slav does?

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 22:51:08 No.497461 Report

Quoted By: >>497462

>>497458
>What happens if you just squat like a slav does?
Personally, I can't squat like that without losing my balance, and I can't extend my ankles far enough to attain the right balance.

But it's more about the fact that your pants are right around your ankles, and no matter your squatting skill level, unless you are leaning off-balance, holding onto a rock or log for support, then your shit is going right down into the pants at your ankles.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 22:55:02 No.497462 Report

Quoted By: >>497467 >>497542 >>497714

>>497461
How do those slavs do it?

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 14 Apr 2015 23:12:34 No.497467 Report

Quoted By: >>497542 >>497714

>>497462

I think its fucking genetic, I'm 1/2 Polish and I just squat naturally and take a massive shit without anything even getting close to my pants.

I think my anterior pelvic tilt has something to do with it. Changes center of gravity or something

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 00:36:28 No.497495 Report

Quoted By:

>>495007

I don't know why, but the image named "shitter chair.jpg" made me fucking lose it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 01:37:28 No.497524 Report

Quoted By: >>497541 >>497554 >>497647 >>497710 >>500015 >>500059 >>503021

innadoors newpleb here, what do you use to wipe your ass? Do you carry paper around?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 01:48:17 No.497532 Report

Quoted By: >>497544 >>497714

>>497421

Its easier to throw a belt around a thin tree and hold onto that while you squat IMO.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 01:53:27 No.497536 Report

Quoted By: >>497555

>>494564

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 01:56:53 No.497541 Report

Quoted By: >>497543

>>497524
I usually snare a squirrel and wipe my bung hole with it. You ain't loved till you've wiped your poo hole with a live animal. Hardest boner you'll ever have.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 01:57:03 No.497542 Report

Quoted By: >>497545 >>497714 >>514760 >>514764

>>497462
>>497467

Squatting is actually a very natural posture for humans but its one of those things that you have to use or you'll lose it. You can train yourself to be able to squat again however. How long it takes depends upon your present level of flexibility. It took me about 6 months.

Squatting is the best way to poop. Seriously, its awesome. No straining and less mess to wipe. It just shoots right out. This is because of pic related. Don't go squatting on top of your porcelain toilet either, they are not designed to hold your weight in that manner. It can break and slice you REAL good. You can get the same effect by placing a small foot stool under your feet while you poop.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 945760_693474207335007_157964859 (...).jpg, 42KiB, 505x379

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 01:58:06 No.497543 Report

Quoted By:

>>497541
>You ain't loved till you've wiped your poo hole with a live animal

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 01:58:25 No.497544 Report

Quoted By:

>>497532
Not a bad idea.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 01:59:33 No.497545 Report

Quoted By: >>497548 >>497655 >>497680 >>497714 >>497970 >>499653

>>497542
I can squat alright, actually. I just can't squat in a way where I have my pants around my legs and the poop goes in a different place. My butthole would be centered right over my pants.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 02:12:35 No.497548 Report

Quoted By: >>497550 >>497714

>>497545

Well pants didnt feature when evolution put the butthole where it is. Try a kilt.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 02:15:12 No.497550 Report

Quoted By: >>497714

>>497548
Or I'll just do the thing that separates modern man from the cro magnon and use a tool to make my life easier, in this case a tree to lean up against.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 02:17:00 No.497552 Report

Quoted By:

>>494560
i`d bag it. take it home. microwave it. then mix it in with a curry. then give it to a bad friend / ex gf i`m about to dump (pun intended).

or parcel force it off to join the ranks of parliment in London.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 02:18:19 No.497554 Report

Quoted By:

>>497524
>Do you carry paper around?

Yes. It barely weighs anything. Pull the cardboard tube out and smash it down and voila: shit tickets.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 02:19:20 No.497555 Report

Quoted By:

>>497536

nah, no one took the bait, like >>497439 said.

am proud.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 03:38:56 No.497603 Report

Quoted By: >>512916

Pro tip: take a piss standing up first to avoid tucking while slavsquatting and shitting on your own dick.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 04:55:17 No.497647 Report

Quoted By:

>>497524
>innadoors newpleb here, what do you use to wipe your ass? Do you carry paper around?

I drag my butt across the ground like a dog.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO squat.jpg, 59KiB, 400x462

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 05:15:05 No.497655 Report

Quoted By: >>497714 >>497719 >>498063 >>499434 >>499653

>>497545
>squatting with butthole over pants
How does this even work?

In a real ATG (ass to grass) squat this doesn't happen
You have to work on your form dude

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 07:22:30 No.497680 Report

Quoted By: >>497714

>>497545
Don't pull your pants to your ankles, just pull it to your knees.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 08:44:21 No.497710 Report

Quoted By:

>>497524
>what do you use to wipe your ass?

stinging nettles or a hedgehog if one happens by

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 08:49:43 No.497714 Report

Quoted By: >>503366

>>497462
>>497467
>>497532
>>497542
>>497545
>>497548
>>497550
>>497655
>>497680

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GqfGzbj3iU8

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 08:57:25 No.497719 Report

Quoted By: >>497720 >>499653

>>497655
>You have to work on your form dude
fuckin /fit/, talking about form without context.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO jongkok.jpg, 14KiB, 375x500

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 08:58:26 No.497720 Report

Quoted By: >>497726 >>498063 >>499653

>>497719
Shit, wrong image

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 09:02:04 No.497724 Report

Quoted By: >>499434

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 09:03:26 No.497726 Report

Quoted By: >>497802 >>497819 >>500807 >>508709 >>508711

>>497720

Do that and you risk this. (nsfw) http://i.imgur.com/jaxlkaV.jpg

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 09:25:44 No.497728 Report

Quoted By:

>>497431
Lold

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 14:22:20 No.497802 Report

Quoted By: >>497804

>>497726
Jeezus man, how sharp can a toilet be.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 14:26:41 No.497804 Report

Quoted By:

>>497802

Well, it's ceramic isn't it so sharp as holy fuck. Like surgical tool sharp.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 15:12:35 No.497819 Report

Quoted By:

>>497726
>butthurt.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 15:23:33 No.497821 Report

Quoted By:

>>496878

> Shitty little Poundland shovel.

Threw my one like that away today. The part where it clips together will snap on you when it gets the chance. Got one of these foldable, compact shovel, saw & pick combo beauties today.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 15:51:38 No.497830 Report

Quoted By: >>512275 >>512919

A better question is what you should wipe with when you're done. Is there a better way than the "rub big leaves on your arm to check for toxins before wiping your ass with it" method?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 15:53:41 No.497832 Report

Quoted By: >>497841

I usually just hold it in until i'm at a proper toilet.
What can i say, i have a cavernous asshole.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 16:12:27 No.497841 Report

Quoted By:

>>497832
lay off the anal sex

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 21:15:31 No.497968 Report

Quoted By:

>>494573
sounds like a good way to get a spider bite on your ass

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 21:21:24 No.497970 Report

Quoted By: >>498063 >>502900

>>497545
remove one boot
slide bootless leg out of pants
pivot pants around other leg
landing area is now clear
poopsqautz

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 21:53:36 No.497987 Report

Quoted By: >>498024

>>494564
>shit in my cookpot
... Say what now?

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 15 Apr 2015 23:10:05 No.498024 Report

Quoted By:

>>497987
We have a winner.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Apr 2015 00:27:39 No.498059 Report

Quoted By:

>>497431
you totally got a hard on for his poo

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 16 Apr 2015 00:30:21 No.498063 Report

Quoted By: >>499434

>>497720
>>497655
Both of these squats would result in shit getting on your pants.

>>497970
>remove one boot
>slide bootless leg out of pants
Takes extra time. If I need to poop, I need to poop NOW.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 18 Apr 2015 10:09:45 No.499420 Report

Quoted By:

When I was in the army we used these cardboard boxes with a hole on the top and a thick garbage bag inside. It didn't hold your weight of course so you had to squat a little, but it worked really good. Of course you can't carry it with you so it's pretty useless in a civilian setting unless you are car camping.

>be first long winter drill
>be 68 degrees north of the equator in January; wet and cold as fuck!
>never shat in a cardboard box before, decide to just hold it in
>day 4 or 5 I give up. What are you 4 years old?
>be on a mountain plateau so there are no trees or nothing for cover, mostly flat, just shitloads of wet, heavy snow and a humid biting cold wind
>my ass feels like it's going to fall off. Can't feel my tighs
>struggle for a long time. It's like passing a brick
>finaly get all the shit out
>imediately feel warmth start to spread through body
>almost start sweating
>so much energy!
>stomach feels better
>I'd love some food right about now
>thefuck didn't I go shit in that cardboard box earlier?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 18 Apr 2015 10:25:15 No.499423 Report

Quoted By: >>499455

>>497181
Actually shaving can make it thicker, but quite literally. It's a genetic thing, some people will get darker and thicker hairs if they shave. But it won't make them magically grow patches of thick fur.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 18 Apr 2015 10:56:51 No.499434 Report

Quoted By: >>499435

>>498063
Put your feet in front like >>497724
not to side like >>497655 and keep your pant around ankle.

There, you get your bomb bay free of obstacle.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 18 Apr 2015 10:58:22 No.499435 Report

Quoted By:

>>499434
>ankle
Shit, I mean knee.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 18 Apr 2015 12:19:55 No.499455 Report

Quoted By:

>>499423
Again, not true. The hair closer to your body is thicker because that's where it's growing from, as it grows it getting thinner. When you shave the thicker part is now the end, and will only feel thicker, there's no more hair folicles than there was before. Let It grow a little while and the ends will thin out just the same as before.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 18 Apr 2015 20:01:03 No.499649 Report

Quoted By: >>499828

>>494809
> Tfw girlfriend shaves your ass for you

Lunch Salads

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1429137990412.jpg, 44KiB, 600x434

Lunch Salads Sat 18 Apr 2015 20:11:07 No.499653 Report

Quoted By: >>499667

>>497545
>>497655
>>497719
>>497720
do none of you guys have trees where you are?
seriously i just grab a tree while squatting to move my ass out further, never got shitpanted ever

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 18 Apr 2015 20:31:36 No.499667 Report

Quoted By:

>>499653
Do you hang off the tree or lean up against it?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 19 Apr 2015 02:45:13 No.499828 Report

Quoted By:

>>499649
That's some serious trust anon.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 19 Apr 2015 10:37:50 No.500015 Report

Quoted By:

>>497524
sticks.
protip: leaves are terrible.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 19 Apr 2015 10:46:17 No.500017 Report

Quoted By:

>>497421
>He doesn't spread his cheeks.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 19 Apr 2015 11:19:44 No.500021 Report

Quoted By:

Just the old belt around tree and hang - method.
I generally dont wipe my ass, the crusts from my asscrack about an hour later provide a great protein source

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1422824368693.jpg, 211KiB, 500x500

Anonymous Sun 19 Apr 2015 14:11:20 No.500057 Report

Quoted By: >>508248

>>494560
I like to climb a tree and watch the shit fall onto the lower branches, havent managed to get it to land and stay on one yet but im working on it.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO TP-ChartCOLOR.jpg, 98KiB, 630x644

Anonymous Sun 19 Apr 2015 14:18:37 No.500059 Report

Quoted By: >>500821

>>497524

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 19 Apr 2015 21:26:23 No.500283 Report

Quoted By:

>>494578
You get dressed again, right?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Apr 2015 01:08:52 No.500369 Report

Quoted By:

>>494564
low bait. pls anon

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO image.jpg, 3MiB, 3264x2448

Anonymous Mon 20 Apr 2015 01:27:38 No.500375 Report

Quoted By:

>>494560
search
-no stream or river close by
dig hole
keep dust near hole
do it squat
paper ( frouch frouch)
cover immediatly
Top ninja

pic related after

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Apr 2015 01:30:14 No.500376 Report

Quoted By:

>>500000
just passing by

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Apr 2015 18:57:15 No.500736 Report

Quoted By: >>502636

I got traveler diarrhea from backpacking my first time. It was horrible I didn't know what to do about pooping. The first night I literally climbed a hill above a creek to poop so I didn't have to worry about people finding it. Also it was the most private spot I could find. (Also a girl)

After that I went to rei and bought poop maps for outdoors and will properly dispose better next time.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Apr 2015 21:27:17 No.500807 Report

Quoted By:

>>497726
>http://i.imgur.com/jaxlkaV.jpg

It can't cut through the bone

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Apr 2015 21:55:00 No.500818 Report

Quoted By:

>>495019

>the arborist
>commenting on cutting ass hair

There is a joke to be made here somewhere

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Apr 2015 21:59:41 No.500821 Report

Quoted By:

>>500059

>sandstone
>better than grass

what?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 20 Apr 2015 22:48:03 No.500832 Report

Quoted By: >>502870

>dig hole
>tie rope between two adjacent trees
>sit/balance on rope
>poop into hole

I seriously hope you guys do this

Sasquatch !j33hRvXovk

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1424369459865.jpg, 51KiB, 573x609

Sasquatch !j33hRvXovk Tue 21 Apr 2015 14:58:22 No.501272 Report

Quoted By:

>>494659

>douches my poopy bottom

LOL

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 21 Apr 2015 15:26:31 No.501290 Report

Quoted By:

>>495019
Do you play UO?

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO poopmaps.jpg, 111KiB, 964x304

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 11:26:43 No.502636 Report

Quoted By: >>502872 >>502928

>>500736

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 18:55:45 No.502869 Report

Quoted By:

This is how I shit

>go to river bank
>undress completely
>collect mud or mix sand and water
>smear mud all over body
>particularly ass and inner tights
>point of mud is to protect skin against fecies
>attatch rope to thick branch over river
>hang myself with the rope
>empty bowels into river

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 19:01:47 No.502870 Report

Quoted By:

>>500832
If you do two ropes, the top one being a bit in front of the lower one, you can even hold on to the top rope and somewhat safely put your weight backwards and really hang your ass over the lower rope.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 19:03:53 No.502872 Report

Quoted By:

>>502636
>poopmap
https://jennz0r.github.io/wasteland/

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 19:44:46 No.502900 Report

Quoted By: >>503272

>>497970
I have peed on many a pant while camping. Fucking vaginas pointing the wrong way.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 19:48:36 No.502904 Report

Quoted By:

>>494585
This.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 19:50:34 No.502905 Report

Quoted By: >>502906

>>494780
Trust Americans to eventually make this a real product...

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 19:53:27 No.502906 Report

Quoted By: >>502910 >>502912

>>502905
I had a roommate that wore adult diapers. They had little dinosaurs on them. Fucking weird, but whatever. To each is own.
Year after he moved out get a message from mutual friend on FaceBook.
Our dino-diaper wearing friend was arrested for child pornography.
Not even joking about this.
Freaked out for a bit, because boyfriend has kids.
Never again will I live with a diaper wearer.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 20:02:26 No.502910 Report

Quoted By: >>502967

>>502906
>They had little dinosaurs on them
The fuck did you find this out?

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 20:06:46 No.502912 Report

Quoted By: >>503337 >>509661 >>515254

>>502906

True story.

When I was a kid I had a habit of ordering everything that was completely free from these catalogs we got in the mail all the time and that had these "try out for free" deals. I just blindely ordered everything because it was fun to get stupid packages in the mail, having no use for most of it.

One time while I was at school a new packet had arrived for me (slip in the mail, have to collect it at post office), and my mom for some reason decided to pick it up for me. On her way home from the post office and the store (on foot) my mom really needs to pee. She actualy ends up peeing her pants (kek) before she gets home.

When I return from school she tells me how she peed her pants after having picked up my package and tells me it better be something important. Then I open the package and it's adult diaper samples :^)

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 20:28:28 No.502928 Report

Quoted By: >>503271

>>502636
I don't know what they are called. I meant mat.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 20:39:06 No.502934 Report

Quoted By:

>>494560
Usually where i go there are thunder boxes, (Wooden boxes with toilet seat over hole) if not then i dig a hole and squat, use wet wipes to wipe

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO image.jpg, 47KiB, 584x329

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 21:43:44 No.502963 Report

Quoted By:

>>497431
Holy shit /out/ you are killin me

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 21:46:28 No.502967 Report

Quoted By:

>>502910
He kept them out in the open on his book shelf. This was no big secret.

One time my boyfriend and I were rolling, and decided to fuck with our other roommate who was too scared to try ecstasy/molly. He would always say he can't do it unless he has someone to fuck.
He has no idea what it is like to be on either, obviously.
Anyways, my bf and I asked our weirdo roommate for some diapers. We put them on under robes, and walked around, making sure you could see them. Just acting normal.
Scared of E roommate refused to acknowledge it. He really thought we were doing weird diaper sex stuff, you know, since E makes you all crazy horny.... He just kept giving us weird looks.
Good times.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 22:05:35 No.502978 Report

Quoted By:

>go into some nearby bushes/behind a tree
>slavsquat and be done in less than 30 seconds
>put some leaves on top
Quick and dirty

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO reclining roman.jpg, 191KiB, 1200x876

Anonymous Thu 23 Apr 2015 23:27:29 No.503021 Report

Quoted By: >>503205

I call it he Nero. Basically you find a flat comfortable spot, recline as shown in this picture, proceed to dig yourself a 4-8 inch deep cat hole, lift one cheek and do the doo. Wipe with the finest leaves nature can provide.

>>494564
well meme'd my friend

>>497431
kek'd

>>497524
smooth river stones, lamb's ear leaves, juniper branches,

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 24 Apr 2015 06:03:44 No.503205 Report

Quoted By: >>503243 >>503273

>>503021
You are a true pioneer, this thread has been squatting this, or sitting that, but no one ever was twisted enough to shit lying down. You may have revolutionized shitting.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 24 Apr 2015 07:06:09 No.503234 Report

Quoted By: >>515526

I prefer to sit around the campfire telling scary stories until I scare the shit out of myself.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 24 Apr 2015 07:13:24 No.503243 Report

Quoted By:

>>503205
>but no one ever was twisted enough to shit lying down
Majority of those immobile american shit while lying down.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 24 Apr 2015 08:49:35 No.503271 Report

Quoted By: >>503420

>>502928
what do you do with this mat?
Do you put kitty litter on it?

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 24 Apr 2015 08:52:58 No.503272 Report

Quoted By: >>503652

>>502900
try pissing from your urethra

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 24 Apr 2015 08:56:36 No.503273 Report

Quoted By:

>>503205
yes, he is truly a revolutionary shitter

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO shitgif.gif, 1MiB, 324x244

Anonymous Fri 24 Apr 2015 10:11:44 No.503294 Report

Quoted By:

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 24 Apr 2015 12:52:24 No.503337 Report

Quoted By:

>>502912

If I pissed myself I definitely wouldn't tell my kid about it

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1425053085828.gif, 2MiB, 460x258

Anonymous Fri 24 Apr 2015 14:26:50 No.503366 Report

Quoted By:

>>497714
>▶
Most underrated post

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 24 Apr 2015 14:31:25 No.503367 Report

Quoted By:

i like to go to campgrounds before the open (usually mid may) and shit right on the tent sites, or on the picnic tables.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 24 Apr 2015 14:36:36 No.503369 Report

Quoted By:

> Not having your body so efficient that you don't produce any waste except urine

It's like you want to be miserable out

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 24 Apr 2015 16:32:05 No.503420 Report

Quoted By: >>503769

>>503271
Oh they are called wag bags

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 24 Apr 2015 17:00:55 No.503432 Report

Quoted By: >>508247

> poop
> wipe until there's no residue on the paper
> 10 mins later, butt feels soupy
> wipe again
> residue on paper

Which is why I never poop in the woods. If I get a poopy butt while hiking I would go insane.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 24 Apr 2015 23:04:13 No.503652 Report

Quoted By: >>503766

>>503272
I prefer to route it through the vagina instead.
My sister dated a man who thought women only had one hole, and they peed from their sex hole. This guy was like 27 too.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO mSqFJ.jpg, 139KiB, 1827x765

Anonymous Sat 25 Apr 2015 02:07:57 No.503766 Report

Quoted By: >>503770 >>504528

>>503652

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 25 Apr 2015 02:13:26 No.503769 Report

Quoted By:

>>503420
Are you from mexico?

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO ew1.jpg, 69KiB, 500x306

Anonymous Sat 25 Apr 2015 02:14:45 No.503770 Report

Quoted By:

>>503766

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 25 Apr 2015 02:38:33 No.503786 Report

Quoted By:

>>495007
Bit o' fertilisation for the sod. I like it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 26 Apr 2015 05:43:56 No.504388 Report

Quoted By: >>506310

>>494560
my preferred method is opening my butt hole and the poo poo comes out
most times its brown poo poo

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 26 Apr 2015 13:32:52 No.504503 Report

Quoted By:

I generally pull my pants down to just above my knees and just squat, never had any mishaps.
>protip: don't relax your pooper untill you're all dookied out. Keeping your sphincter open minimizes the amount of poop sticking to yer butthole, often resulting in a golden drop

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 26 Apr 2015 15:11:29 No.504528 Report

Quoted By:

>>503766
how small was that dude's dick to be fucking her in her piss hole?

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 28 Apr 2015 00:01:50 No.505267 Report

Quoted By:

Not wiping your bunghole with posion oak, did that recenetly, not fun. Jk it was awesome.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Exploding shit pile.gif, 1MiB, 325x283

Anonymous Wed 29 Apr 2015 18:19:08 No.506215 Report

Quoted By:

>>494659
thank you for the top laugh.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO jNKK151.gif, 2MiB, 260x200

Anonymous Wed 29 Apr 2015 21:44:43 No.506310 Report

Quoted By:

>>504388
>mfw reading that whole reply

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 29 Apr 2015 21:58:22 No.506314 Report

Quoted By:

>>494566
Underrated post

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Perfect.jpg, 4MiB, 2592x1944

Anonymous Sun 03 May 2015 09:25:33 No.508244 Report

Quoted By: >>508285 >>509649

Done it lots of times but never thought how to describe it. (Nobody has ever asked!) I think I try to adjust to local requirements. (To dig, not to dig, carry out etc.) Where I live I think I do it like most others. Walk well away from the others to a place where nobody unlikely will go for other purposes. Away from water and out of sight from the path! When having found the perfect spot, I just pull down my shorts to the knee, squats and let nature take its course. Wipes and - voilà. Usually done in one minute. Be aware when camping in the wilderness with others because especially in the morning others may be out there for the same reason. Never a pleasant experience to walk in on one of the friends. Everybody knows that all others do it too, but still the encounter is an embarrassing experience (for both parts!) I have experienced it a couple of times, being in both roles. The worst incident probably when picking blueberries in the woods with my family and some relatives, walking in on my aunt squatting and just about to wipe after leaving a stinky cable on the ground. I was around 13 years old by then. I enclose a picture showing the entrance to our toilet for some days taken last summer when camping in the wildernes.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 May 2015 09:48:46 No.508247 Report

Quoted By:

>>503432

happens to me all the time, i can't figure out what's causing it. no matter how much i wipe, using wet wipes as well, after a couple of minutes/hours there's residue on paper again.

i don't crap in the woods, obviously, because same reason

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 May 2015 09:53:31 No.508248 Report

Quoted By: >>508310

>>500057
>
but then the shit on the branches as you climb down?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 May 2015 12:36:28 No.508285 Report

Quoted By:

>>508244
I must admit that probably even more worse than walking in on my aunt was an incident a few years back. We were at a felucca trip on the Nile. No toilets, we just had to go somewhere along the shore. One morning I had found shelter behind a dense bush. Squatting, trousers down, just leaving my stuff on the ground, one of the women (a Dutch lady, 60+) from our boat suddenly came by. Oh sorry she exclaimed when she saw me. She turned and disappeared quickly. Afterwards none of us mentioned the incident.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 May 2015 13:47:41 No.508310 Report

Quoted By: >>508655

>>508248
I've managed to avoid stepping in it so far by shimmying around the tree like some sort of shitbranch avoiding squirrel.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 May 2015 13:51:44 No.508314 Report

Quoted By:

>>494982
im reminded of a joke about a bear and a rabbit

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 May 2015 17:49:11 No.508398 Report

Quoted By:

I use an etool that I got when I was in the army. Dig a hole, set the shovel head at a ninety degree angle to the shaft and put on cheek on it. I then use it as a stool and shit in my hole. Clean up with a rag I carry around for wiping my ass. Bury my shit. Wash my rag in the next bit of running water I find.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1403199486838.gif, 2MiB, 383x293

Anonymous Sun 03 May 2015 18:37:58 No.508446 Report

Quoted By:

>>494560
Finally, an excuse to explain this.
I call it the "Reverse Three Point Stance"
It starts as a regular old squat, then you lean back, holding yourself up with one arm, while pushing you cock&ball combo down with the other arm to prevent urinating on your northface cargo pants. This allows extremely accurate shit spewing on just about any type of terrain.
>>497421
This is close, but resting on a log or rock increases the angle of penis (AOP). The squatting also helps to spread the cheeks naturally, reducing the fecal friction coefficient (FFC) by almost 60%, and sometimes even 100% for a hairless /out/doorsman

I don't have very many friends

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1414279010157.png, 67KiB, 233x232

Anonymous Sun 03 May 2015 18:49:07 No.508452 Report

Quoted By:

>>494659
>throw it at a squirrel or a bird
Oh my god, thank you for this.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 May 2015 21:30:47 No.508586 Report

Quoted By:

>>494566
Kek

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 May 2015 22:27:21 No.508655 Report

Quoted By: >>510373

>>508310
Mr. Lakey is that you?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 May 2015 23:25:33 No.508709 Report

Quoted By: >>508711

>>497726
Eh, not really. The real story behind those pictures is - she stood on the bowl itself, with the toilet seat up (which is supposed to redistribute your weight more evenly around the bowl, btw.) to change a lightbulb, slipped and it cost her an ass. Carefully squatting on the toilet sea is perfectly fine unless you're 200kg.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 03 May 2015 23:26:37 No.508711 Report

Quoted By:

>>497726
>>508709
Also
>first picture
>no blood at all
Yeah, nah.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 04 May 2015 22:05:49 No.509343 Report

Quoted By:

I used to have a phobia of shitting in the woods. I counteracted this with a deer blind.
Now if I am feeling creative, I will stack some branches in a log house style structure. with a hole at the bottom. If I am desperate to drop a doom, I will find a tree and squat against it.
I've tried shitting off the edge of a bucket and that resulted in poo being smeared all down it.
I'll usually find some big ass maple leaves and wipe down with that. If presented with a situation where no toilet paper is to be found, I have been known to use t-shirt sleeves

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 04 May 2015 22:37:07 No.509376 Report

Quoted By: >>512921

Do you really just wipe with leaves? That doesn't sound too effective.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 04 May 2015 22:49:46 No.509390 Report

Quoted By: >>515154

i find the closest groundhog or chipmunk hole and aim my shit towards it

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 05 May 2015 07:57:01 No.509649 Report

Quoted By: >>516585

>>508244
>not posting a pic of your aunts cable

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 05 May 2015 09:22:28 No.509661 Report

Quoted By:

>>502912
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7MCj4YeUEik

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 06 May 2015 09:18:16 No.510373 Report

Quoted By:

>>508655
Hi Charlotte

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 08 May 2015 21:16:45 No.511675 Report

Quoted By:

>>497431

>mud monkey
lol

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Sponge-on-stick.jpg, 37KiB, 550x413

Anonymous Sat 09 May 2015 03:47:59 No.511878 Report

Quoted By: >>512124

Yall are fucking stupid if you want to wipe your ass do as the Romans did they would have pots with water and wipe with these bad boys.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 09 May 2015 18:40:52 No.512122 Report

Quoted By:

>>494659
I don't get it. A completely fabricated story about how you shit... and it's not even funny. There's literally NOTHING funny about throwing a poop-filled condom at a squirrel or a bird

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO fallen-tree-woods-19181114.jpg, 70KiB, 400x267

Anonymous Sat 09 May 2015 18:43:01 No.512124 Report

Quoted By: >>512133

>>511878
I just drag my anus across a fallen tree. It's like playing guitar, you won't be pro until you build-up your callouses

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 09 May 2015 18:57:51 No.512133 Report

Quoted By: >>512134

>>512124
Only problem is you'll probably bleed out before you even become a "guitar player" because you ripped up a huge wound in the middle of the forest, all alone.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 38_file.jpg, 2KiB, 244x121

Anonymous Sat 09 May 2015 19:00:46 No.512134 Report

Quoted By:

>>512133
I practice at home with a bastard file. It's like alligator skin down there

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 09 May 2015 23:03:51 No.512255 Report

Quoted By:

>>496840
tbh this tbh

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 09 May 2015 23:53:12 No.512275 Report

Quoted By:

>>497830
this

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 May 2015 01:49:55 No.512906 Report

Quoted By: >>512910 >>512936

Anyone else shave their asshole to make wiping piss easy?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 May 2015 01:52:02 No.512910 Report

Quoted By: >>512914

>>512906
wait, why the hell would you be wiping piss from your saltlick? you got your pipes tangled or suttin?

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 1395705828913 (1).png, 151KiB, 500x376

Anonymous Mon 11 May 2015 01:54:49 No.512911 Report

Quoted By:

>>494566
>rope breaks

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 May 2015 01:58:26 No.512914 Report

Quoted By: >>512915

>>512910
Read it the post this way.

Anyone else shave their asshole to make wiping easy?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 May 2015 02:02:00 No.512915 Report

Quoted By:

>>512914
No I don't shave my saltlick. I like my mossy behind tyvm.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 May 2015 02:04:08 No.512916 Report

Quoted By: >>512917

>>497603
Second. This is for truth

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 May 2015 02:08:12 No.512917 Report

Quoted By:

>>512916
my peanus won't reach anyway :[

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 May 2015 02:09:42 No.512919 Report

Quoted By: >>515535

>>497830
Smooth river rocks. Pine cones (correct direction dependent.) Sticks. Snow. Sometimes pieces of bark. Leaves suck donkey balls. I always save two to three squares of TP for an 'insurance' wipe. When I'm innawoods, I wipe my ass with damn near anything I can find, but save the last one.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 May 2015 02:19:18 No.512921 Report

Quoted By: >>513337

>>509376
Leaves are fucking terrible. Look for other foragables.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 May 2015 03:07:17 No.512936 Report

Quoted By:

>>512906
>tits or gtfo

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 May 2015 20:29:02 No.513337 Report

Quoted By: >>513709 >>515535

>>512921
like what?

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 May 2015 20:38:30 No.513342 Report

Quoted By: >>513703

I have been on 24 hour overnighters in the woods the last two weekends and both times I didn't have to shit. Or, this weekend I kinda had to but I decided to just hold it since I would be home in a few hours anyway. Pretty soon I'm doing two night and I am starting to realise that I will have to shit in the woods. I know it will work out just fine and will feel great afterwards but I'm still dreading it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 May 2015 21:30:51 No.513364 Report

Quoted By:

>>494560
Put half ass on rock
shit
wipe with toilet paper
brun said toilet paper
Shitting made easy

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 12 May 2015 09:33:50 No.513703 Report

Quoted By:

>>513342
It's not healthy to hold it in. If you spread you cheeks big time it reduces the amount stuck to your date.
What aspect are you dreading?

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Morning duty.jpg, 537KiB, 1354x1288

Anonymous Tue 12 May 2015 09:38:58 No.513705 Report

Quoted By: >>513706

This is my method. Wife and I have just started our vacation. This year driving around Europe for almost four months in an old VW Camper without a toilet

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 12 May 2015 09:43:22 No.513706 Report

Quoted By: >>514319

>>513705
fucking disgusting hippy behavior.
this is why I can't camp everywhere in new zealand because shitty people like you exist

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO R324545.jpg, 121KiB, 500x375

Anonymous Tue 12 May 2015 09:47:31 No.513709 Report

Quoted By: >>513711

>>513337

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 12 May 2015 09:48:37 No.513711 Report

Quoted By: >>514025

>>513709
forgot words.
Use sticks.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 12 May 2015 21:10:30 No.514025 Report

Quoted By:

>>513711
No.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO shenanigans.jpg, 51KiB, 640x480

Anonymous Tue 12 May 2015 21:32:07 No.514042 Report

Quoted By: >>514069

>>494560
dig a hole, squat down with my feet about shoulder width apart, pull my pants down to knees, shit, wipe, pants up, bury shit.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 12 May 2015 22:14:58 No.514069 Report

Quoted By:

>>514042
>>494560
I usually roll a rock, stump, or log over, shidd in the hole, and then roll the rock, stump, or log back on top of it. This bonds the rock, stump, or log to gaia with your shidd.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 13 May 2015 05:11:02 No.514319 Report

Quoted By:

>>513706
I can assure that I follow local rules and customs. Certainly hiding it. But I still find it convenient and even necessary to talk with Gaia the basic way when outside and no facilities around. My wife and I have discussed it and both of us prefer to do it rather than to put it off and wait for the next toilet. Constipation is not an attractive option. For sure we are not the only ones, and it is not only for hippies. Last summer I went for a hike with a quite large group. I shall not go into details but I can confirm that even "grandmas and grandpas" went away into the bushes with the roll of tp in the hands. And, yes, grey panthers also have with bums.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 13 May 2015 05:48:33 No.514325 Report

Quoted By:

>>495019
>>495013
>>494809
How the fuck do you not use Google to answer this?
http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/expert-answers/hair-removal/faq-20058427

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 13 May 2015 06:54:59 No.514345 Report

Quoted By:

I like to find a downed log. I will sit and hang my ass over and poop. Then i'll kick some leaves over it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 14 May 2015 02:43:13 No.514760 Report

Quoted By:

>>497542
Always glad to see a low toilet in a public restroom for this reason. So much easier to clear the ol' poop chute in a squat

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 14 May 2015 02:48:19 No.514764 Report

Quoted By:

>>497542
there's no way my puborectalis and sphincter muscles look like that. not anymore anyway. >_>

/pol/pot

/pol/pot Thu 14 May 2015 12:08:41 No.514932 Report

Quoted By:

>>494560
Some people do it in abandoned fireplaces, and burn it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 14 May 2015 18:10:00 No.515154 Report

Quoted By:

>>509390
Kek

Anonymous

Anonymous Thu 14 May 2015 20:43:48 No.515254 Report

Quoted By:

>>502912
Good thing i have a fetish for that

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 15 May 2015 01:51:10 No.515526 Report

Quoted By:

>>503234
>chuckled

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 15 May 2015 01:54:37 No.515535 Report

Quoted By:

>>513337
See
>>>512919

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 15 May 2015 03:55:33 No.515619 Report

Quoted By:

I just squat, i used a leaf one time.

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO Trip2.jpg, 7KiB, 168x150

Anonymous Sat 16 May 2015 15:03:04 No.516585 Report

Quoted By:

>>509649
..... my aunt, at a trip to the woods

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 17 May 2015 07:07:08 No.517014 Report

Quoted By:

I prefer to find a hidden spot behind a bush or a stone, pull down, squat and open up. (And pray that nobody will come by.....) I know that all other outdoor enthusiasts also pop au naturel, but I hate to be observed, and I even get embarrassed when seeing others.

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