/out/ - Outdoors » Thread #663080

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Anonymous Sun 10 Jan 2016 20:24:57 No.663080 View View Reply Original Report

Quoted By: >>663085 >>663092 >>663096 >>663098 >>663317 >>663332 >>663338 >>663353 >>663638 >>663639 >>664007 >>664083 >>664097 >>664119

ok /out/ im sick of this shit
i'm getting bullied alot by bears everytime i go innawoods
one of them just groped me and laughed at me and called me a lardass last time. everyone laughed at me even squirrels.

how do i stop bears from bullying me?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 10 Jan 2016 20:28:22 No.663085 Report

Quoted By:

>>663080
Lose some weight fatty

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 10 Jan 2016 20:35:45 No.663092 Report

Quoted By:

>>663080
You are just gonna have to let the forest animals have their ways with you. Bring plenty of lube.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 10 Jan 2016 20:40:03 No.663095 Report

Quoted By:

It sounds like your problem is furries, not bears.

Lucky, the cure for both is gunfire.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 10 Jan 2016 20:40:07 No.663096 Report

Quoted By:

>>663080
Fuck that shit anon, women today are not worth the effort.
Your best bet is to go full MGTOW and never look back.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 10 Jan 2016 20:43:22 No.663098 Report

Quoted By: >>663296

>>663080
W-wanna go Enoing with me?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 10 Jan 2016 23:38:59 No.663296 Report

Quoted By:

>>663098
WAT

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sun 10 Jan 2016 23:58:54 No.663317 Report

Quoted By:

>>663080

Learn it. Love it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 Jan 2016 00:15:19 No.663332 Report

Quoted By:

>>663080
Write about it on tumblr.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 Jan 2016 00:16:52 No.663338 Report

Quoted By:

>>663080
They're just flirting with you, if you don't want the attention don't dress so provocatively.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 Jan 2016 00:30:09 No.663353 Report

Quoted By:

>>663080
That depends. What kind of bears are bullying you?
Black Bears: Just stand up for yourself. They may look tough but they're all pussies who back down if they encounter the merest resistance. Even your scrawny current self can stand up to a black bear. Yelling is usually sufficient, occasionally a punch or kick may be needed.
Brown Bear: You're going to need to start working out. Once you're strong you need to establish dominance over the bears. The fight will be long and bloody but with hard work and guts you can prevail to establish your self as Lord of the Grizzly Bears.
Polar Bear: You're pretty much fucked. Give up your dreams of being /out/ and go back into the city to cry because you do not fuck with polar bears.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 Jan 2016 14:08:55 No.663638 Report

Quoted By:

>>663080
>how do i stop bears from bullying me?
Stay out of Provincetown and San Francisco

Anonymous

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Anonymous Mon 11 Jan 2016 14:15:39 No.663639 Report

Quoted By: >>663654

>>663080

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 Jan 2016 15:01:38 No.663654 Report

Quoted By: >>663683

>>663639
5.56 for a bear...? I don't think so Tim

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 Jan 2016 16:23:53 No.663683 Report

Quoted By: >>663735

>>663654
That's nice. It's 7.62 genius

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 Jan 2016 16:34:45 No.663688 Report

Quoted By:

You need to show your dominance, Anon, otherwise the Bears will never leave you be. Here's what to do

>Go to the local bear bar, easily spotted by the amount of foxes hanging around out front
>grab two of said foxes and gently insert your arms inside them from the back, how you do it is up to you
>you how have fury fox fists
>maul the bouncer with your FFFs and wear his body like a furry exoskeleton
>Beararmourreceived
>discard the FFFs, they have served their purpose
>walk into the bear club and tell every bear to fuck off
>seeing as you are wearing the bouncer, they'll all obey and leave
>you now have control of the bear club
>exit the bouncer and proceed to shit on every surface you can find
>when the Bears return the bed night, your scent will be all over their prized club, they have no choice but to submit and crown you as their King
>you are now King of the Bears. No bear will dare laugh at you in the woods again
>you can also use you bear legions to wage war on the squirrels

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 Jan 2016 18:08:20 No.663735 Report

Quoted By:

>>663683

Ya blew it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Mon 11 Jan 2016 18:12:36 No.663737 Report

Quoted By:

"Lips" Banáne

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 12 Jan 2016 02:02:18 No.664007 Report

Quoted By:

>>663080

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 12 Jan 2016 06:21:54 No.664083 Report

Quoted By:

>>663080
Carry a rifle

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 12 Jan 2016 07:39:39 No.664097 Report

Quoted By:

>>663080

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 12 Jan 2016 08:00:08 No.664100 Report

Quoted By:

You know what you must do OP

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 12 Jan 2016 09:22:44 No.664119 Report

Quoted By:

>>663080
Bring a kayak. The bear will bully the kayak instead of you, but only if you shout NO BEAR PLEASE STOP

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 13 Jan 2016 22:05:40 No.665246 Report

Quoted By:

You dun goofed Op.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 16 Jan 2016 18:54:34 No.667179 Report

Quoted By:

TheYankeeMarshal has a few videos on this subject exactly.

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