>>4154652Here's how you have to analyze these photos, anon. Trust me, I'm a professional.
1. Top left is a complete and total larp. A costume. Look at her hands. She can't even hold cards or a whiskey bottle correctly. She's certainly not going to "protect you" from a god damned thing. My guess is the whiskey is poisoned.
2. Top right is obviously trying waaaaaaay too hard to be some sort of photography Jane Goodall/female Anthony Bourdain wannabe which means she doesn't even know herself which means she sure as shit doesn't give a single damn about you. My best guess is there's some type of automatic retracting razor wire hidden in the scarf that she will put around your neck saying "it's cute" before she activates it.
3. Bottom left is the "manic pixie dream girl" type that all the dipshits like Zach Braff types think will make all their wet dreams come true. Don't trust her. She's not real. Plus they're really annoying in real life. No doubt she's the most tactful in her attempts to kill you and it will no doubt be planned to look like some sort of accident. Trip and fall type of death, etc. She will think she can act her way out of it and will put on a dramatic show for the police. Send this note to them if you must, "Don't trust her."
4. Bottom right is quite clearly the one to protect you. Why? She's the only one trying to look hot. Why does this matter? She's the only one who actually likes men. Wants your attention and works hard to keep your attention. But more, she knows how to give a proper "come hither" look. Meaning, this ain't her first rodeo. She's loved and lost before and, god damn it, she's not gonna lose it again. Go to her anon. Go to her.
Again, trust me, I'm a professional.
