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I saw Seth Rollins at a grocery store in Iowa yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything. He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” while adjusting a pair of oversized, fur-lined goggles.
I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “HA-HA-HAAA! HUH? HA-HA-HAAA!” in that high-pitched cackle, snapping his fingers in my face in time with his entrance music rhythm. I walked away to finish my shopping, and I could hear him humming his own theme song from three aisles over.
When I came to pay for my stuff up front, I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen bags of gourmet espresso beans and a single bottle of hair conditioner without paying. He was wearing a floor-length neon pink bathrobe and sequined boots.
The girl at the counter was very nice about it and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be "The Visionary" and said he was "operating on a higher frequency than the concept of currency," but eventually he turned back around and brought them to the counter.
When she took one of the bags and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually to prevent any “electrical infetterence” with his 'Revolutionary Aura,' and then turned around and winked at me through his goggles. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by conducting an imaginary orchestra and yawning so loudly it sounded like a scream.