Quoted By:
>Now last week, I was watching the Palantir, and I watched a 6,211 year old dragon come out here who has more loose scales than an old dwarf chestpiece, come out here and say he's still the man.
>I seen Smaug, number two, the fire-drake, come out here, who's been the butt-end of all the jokes, because he's supposed to be the treasure hoarding, fire breathing, son of a gun, but I'm sayin' one time, you shoulda took a cab, and used that money to fix your crooked, yellow teeth!
>So I had to ask myself, if the Lonely Mountain was gonna hire the fire-drake Number Two, why wouldn't they hire the real fire-drake, the original fire-drake, Glaurung? Now I know that Glaurung is dead, Eru rest his soul, but Smaug, your career is dead!
>And I know as he lays sixty feet under, he's still stylin' and profilin', 'cos when you used your little brain, and stole his name, there's one thing that you couldn't steal, and that was his class.
>So when you burned down Lake-town last night, I know I wasn't alone, 'cos the people at home, all they did, was grab the remote, and change the channel to Khazad-dum, and watch Durin's Bane, a person you and your old friends got fired from here, 'cos you're a jealous, old bastard!
>So Smaug, remember this, in this dwarf-killing business, there's never been a bigger ass-kissin', butt-suckin' bastard, in this business, but also in life, you're the biggest ass-kissin', back-stabbin', butt-suckin' bastard, and you belong where you're at, in the Lonely Mountain, because the Lonely Mountain sucks, and so do you. Me? I'm just gonna stay right here, in D-A-L-E, 4 life.
