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There is a fed in Connecticut
They call the Dub Dub Ee
And it's been the ruin of many a poor Rhodes
And God, that includes me
My brother wanted breast implants
Just to try to get on TV
My father was a polka dot
Down in Dub Dub Ee
Now the only thing a Rhodes needs
Is a suitcase and a dream
And the only time he's satisfied
Is when he's on the screen
Oh mother, tell your children
Not to go on the indies
Waste your time trying to get over
Just to crawl back to Dub Dub Ee
Well, I got one foot in the terminal
The other foot on the plane
I'm goin' back to Dub Dub Ee
To wear that ball and chain
There is a fed in Connecticut
They call the Dub Dub Ee
And it's been the ruin of many a poor Rhodes
And God, that includes me