I LARPED AS BIRD AND THE FANS SAID GO TO HELL
I TRIED TO FLY BUT I JUST FELL
I TRIED TO DANCE TO A STUPID SONG
BUT ALL I KNOW IS FALLING DOWN

BUT THERE IS ONE THING THAT I'VE ACHIEVED
AND IT REVOLVES AROUND OUR CATERING

I'LL NEVER WIN THE WORLD TITLE
THE WOMEN'S OR THE TAG
BUT I'M THE CHEEZ-IT CHAMPION
THE BEST THEY'VE EVER HAD

NO ONE LOVES CHEEZ-ITS
MORE THAN MEEEEEEEE
I WAS TRYING TO CATCH THEM
WHEN I FLEW INTO THE UGLY TREE

I'LL NEVER WIN THE WORLD TITLE
THE WOMEN'S OR THE TAG
BUT I'M THE CHEEZ-IT CHAMPION
THE BEST THEY'VE EVER HAD
YEAH I'M THE CHEEZ-IT CHAMPION
THE BEST THEY'VE EVER HAD