Hello everyone, and welcome to another installment of K-WAB wrestling, and that stands for Kino Wrestling for Autistic Bastards, meaning autistic bastards like you and me. Tonight we will be taking a break from Saturday Night Metal, as I am in the process of reworking some things. Instead, we will have up to 24 competitors fighting to the death for a shot at the K-WAB Gigadimes Championship.
Anonymous
Quoted By:
>>18369734 Hogan KWABOTY simple as
Anonymous
>I'm the Boogeyman, and I'm coming to get you!
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18369752 Good choice! The Boogeyman is our first entrant.
Anonymous
mista bookaman you know who i am i'm da iron sheik put me in hunger games so i can suplex jabroni put them in a camel clutch break their backs and fuck their asses to make them humble old country way
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18369798 Good to see you again Sheik, you are now contestant number two.
Anonymous
The debut episode of the UPWG will premier tonight after the conclusion of the current program. The Union of /PW/ Generals is a shoot wrestling promotion that features the generals of /pw/ going to battle against each other. UPWG will operate on a by monthly schedule.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18369811 Very interesting. I appreciate you not attempting to counter program us, and I will definitely see what you've got after this is over.
Anonymous
I nominate marty jannetty, the killer of all faggots
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18369850 Excellent, Marty Jannetty will be number three.
Anonymous
Shingo Takagi will one day rule Japan as the new Shogun, but for now he will enter this tournament and destroy them with the fire of the dragon.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18369865 Very good, that gives us four. Shingo is definitely welcome.
Anonymous
>>18369734 >special... you think you're special... Anonymous
I MAKE A BEST PIZZA FROM ALLA YOU DEAD BODIES MAMA MIA
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18369881 Sure why not, Fred Durst gets in there at number five
>>18369893 And Luigi will be number six. We're coming along nicely now.
Anonymous
And coming straight from the penalty box....Da GOOOOOOOON
Anonymous
I'm violent J, the southwest detroit juggalo. put me in this bitch.
Anonymous
>>18369734 Starting this moment, from now, from this moment on, this will be the moment, starting now, of the Genesis of McGillicutty
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18369913 Well, that's not one that I expected anyone to enter, but that's fine. The goon is number seven.
>>18369922 And Violent J makes eight.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18369931 Interesting, I did not know that Curt Hennig had a son in the wrestling business. Ok he gets in at number nine.
Anonymous
It's time to job. Knuckleball Schwartz is on the job!
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18369961 No I draw the line at this one, he's simply too dimeless.
Anonymous
>>18369734 r-remember when I was on D-dynamite, M-oooooorty?
Anonymous
>He got my name wrong, it's The Human Holocaust!
Anonymous
you ain't doin this shit without me nigga
Anonymous
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18369971 Sponsors don't count, otherwise we'd have people entering slim jims and superman
>>18369975 Ok, we can work with this one. Human Holocaust gets in there at number ten.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18369976 Excellent, the kang is always welcome here. He will be number eleven.
>>18369977 Good choice. Was wondering when someone would enter the Hulkster. He gets number twelve.
Anonymous
I am now Kay Malique Shabez Austin. I'm black yall and i'm blackety black and i'm BLACK YALL
Anonymous
HERE HE COMES, GARY STRYDOOOOM WOOOOOOOOOOOW
Anonymous
I'm entering this fat fuck because there isn't much that can realistically kill him except a heart attack.
Anonymous
Time to get jiggy with it
Anonymous
Quoted By:
>>18370015 Kek wrong image
Anonymous
My name is Kizarny. Wizelcome tizo thize Cizarnival. Lizots izof fizun. My name is Kizarny.
Anonymous
I'm submitting Katie Vick to go into the fray
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18370003 A wigger Steve Austin? Ok that works.
>>18370015 Gary Strydom is a bodybuilder and never wrestled so I have to deny this one.
>>18370018 I almost think he should take up two spots. But yeah he's in and that brings us to fourteen.
Anonymous
I'm submitting Layla's Ass. Not Layla, Layla's Ass. It still works me into shooting, brother.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18370021 I think entering God would be a little too much.
>>18370028 Never heard of him but that's fine, he gets in at number fifteen.
Anonymous
No KWAB is complete without Big Daddy Cool himself...
Anonymous
Hulk Hogan, We comin for you nigga!
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
>>18370032 I'll allow it just because it's hilarious and fucked up
>>18370044 poste a good closeup of her ass and i'll allow it
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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>>18370058 I agree, that's a good choice indeed
>>18370059 Ok Booker T gets in there too
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
6 spots remain!
Anonymous
SIPPIN ON DOWN
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18370085 I always liked 2 Tuff Tony, that brings it down to five spots remaining.
Anonymous
Quoted By:
ROB...VAN...DAM
Anonymous
>>18370062 How about several?
Anonymous
I'll throw in Mr. Electricity Herb Abrams.
Anonymous
WOOOOOOO put me in that tournament brotha!
Anonymous
God forbid someone try to win tournament.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18370111 Lol ok that will do. As weird as this one is I'll allow it.
>>18370115 Very original choice, he's in
>>18370120 And of course the Nature Boy is welcome as well.
Anonymous
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18370123 Undertaker is the final entrant! Excellent! Ok let me get things ready here and I'll post the first day's results.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18370129 I'm sorry Jack but you were just a little too late. We already have the maximum number of contestants.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
So far everyone is just running away from the cornucopia (which is just a pile of weapons and tools) because everyone knows it will be a bloodbath. However, 2 Tuff Tony and the Boogeyman have taken sickles.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
It seems that Marty Jannetty and the Boogeyman are hanging out with a corpse and a severed ass. Not surprising, actually. Yoko and Taker snatch empty backpacks for a minor KWAB moment.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
And we have our first deaths. Mabel falls into a pit and dies, probably because his fat ass couldn't climb out. Meanwhile Violent J and the Sheik try to get out of the tournament by threatening a double suicide. However, it backfires and they both simply die from the poison berries.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
Most of these guys are also wisely running from the bloodbath. However, the Goon has found some explosives while the Human Holocaust has acquired a first aid kit.
Anonymous
>>18370187 So that's what caused the earthquake...
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
Not surprisingly, Nash has sprained his ankle while running away from the Hulkster. He fears the sword of Hulkamania brother! Kizarny doesn't seem to realize where he is because he's just picking flowers. In other news, the Boogeyman uses his disgusting mystical powers to hunt down and kill Luigi Primo.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Looks like everyone is hunting here, Taker is picking fruit while Marty Jannetty is getting robbed.
>>18370202 kek
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
At the end of day one we have four casualties:>The Iron Sheik >Mabel >Violent J >Luigi Primo
Anonymous
Quoted By:
>>18370235 ten pure plums... mmmhmmm... mmmm
Anonymous
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>>18370247 four good soldiers lost lol
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
Drawing on his coconut monkey heritage, Yokozuna spears McGillicutty in the gut! He does seem to be alive for now, though wounded. This is followed by a big tag team fight, with RVD and the Human Holocaust taking on wigger Austin and Booker T. It appears that RVD and the Holocaust came out on the losing end. Herb Abrams and the Goon are plotting something together, which probably involves cocaine and whores.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
As Nash and the Boogeyman rest, Katie Vick's semen-riddled corpse again robs Marty Jannetty, this time killing him in the process! Meanwhile Fred Durst attempts to treat his chronic syphilis and the Undertaker gets a care package of explosives, presumably from his biker friends.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Katie Vick's corpse has claimed yet another victim, as 2 Tuff Tony is killed for his supplies just like Marty. That coffin must be full of supplies by now. Meanwhile Flair seems to be teaming up with Booker T while Layla's ass somehow falls into a frozen lake and drowns. Guess the ass was trying to wash itself and chose the wrong pond.
Anonymous
>>18370289 >>18370304 KATIE VICK IS OUT FOR BLOOD
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
Taker has found a cave, which he will probably use to sacrifice people to the devil or store dead bodies. Herb Abrams discovers a river, but still no coke or whores (much to his disappointment). Meanwhile Yoko and the Goon are teaming up. Someone (probably Wolfie) also sent Nash some food.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
OH SHIT! A VOLCANO JUST ERUPTED! WHO WILL SURVIVE THIS? It looks like Booker T has done his last shucky ducky quack quack because he got buried in hot ash! And Kevin Nash dips his weapon in the lava and uses it to kill the Undertaker! Now that is something we did not expect!
>>18370309 Considering that the prize for winning is a match with Kane, it's going to be really funny if she wins.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
This volcano is going over all kinds of people. Kizarny fell into the lava, pulling wigger Austin in with him. The same thing happened with Yokozuna and Fred Durst. And then, that cokehead bastard Herb Abrams pushes Ric Flair in the lava as well! He will be missed. naturally katie vick survives.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
Unfortunately, the volcano got the Boogeyman as well. No more worms for him, I'm afraid.
Anonymous
Quoted By:
Herb is going over
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
Day two was an absolute bloodbath thanks to the volcano, so we have 14 deaths:>Michael McGillicutty >Rob Van Dam >Human Holocaust >Marty Jannetty >2 Tuff Tony >Layla's Ass >Booker T >The Undertaker >Kizarny >Wigger Austin >Ric Flair >Yokozuna >Fred Durst >The Boogeyman
Anonymous
Quoted By:
THE VOLCANO IS GOING OVER BROTHER
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
The Hulkster receives some explosives from Eric Bischoff, while Herb receives some water from his jew sponsors. Shingo is being tortured by nightmares, presumably nightmares about someone stealing Poi from him. But look at this! Katie Vick's corpse has killed Kevin Nash!
Anonymous
Anonymous
you can turn off superevents but I guess it's fine if you want it to go quicker
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
OH and it looks like everyone is ganging up on Herb Abrams! He's been beaten to death by Hogan, the Goon, and Shingo! Katie Vick's corpse decides to just sit in her box and rot some more.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
>>18370372 I thought about doing that, but this way is more interesting imo
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Katie Vick's corpse is now picking flowers, adding to the huge pile of stolen goods in her casket. meanwhile Shingo screams KITA KITA KITAAAAAA and goes after the Goon, who sprains his ankle running in fear.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Ok somehow it seems that darkside Hogan was also killed. that doesn't really seem right since it said he survived that last fight.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
Ok that's weird, now it's saying Hogan is alive again. Weird glitch but whatever. It seems that the Hulkster has killed Shingo with those explosives that Bischoff sent him earlier!
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
Well she had a hell of a run, but it seems that Katie Vick's corpse has finally bled out. I would have thought she already ran out of blood years ago but it is what it is.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Quoted By:
And look at that! While Hogan was hunting for the Goon, he died of an infection! That's what he gets for fucking all those fat hockey groupies!
Anonymous
Quoted By:
>>18370367 he came back from the dead with the power of hulkamania brother
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, HERE IS YOUR WINNER...THE IMMORTAL HULK HOGAN!
Anonymous
Quoted By:
>>18370455 absolute dimes, even a volcano couldn't stop the hulkster
Anonymous
Quoted By:
>>18370378 >>18370397 Goon and Shingo survive, Herb and Hogan died. you cheated the results but whatever, Hulkamania is immortal, brother
Anonymous
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Ladies and gentlemen, this concludes our broadcast for the evening. We thank all of you who chose to participate and/or enjoy the show. Next week, we will have a new episode of Saturday Night Metal with a new format, so until then this is Pepe Von Erich signing off!
Anonymous
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I thought wrestling was fake and this was real...
Anonymous
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Lots of fun and a good finish. A good little show.
Anonymous
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>>18370474 looking forward to next week, hope it goes smoother.
Anonymous
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>>18370474 this wasn't bad, your shit keeps improving with each week so I'll keep lurking.
Anonymous
>>18370474 bruh we need herb abrams vs cokane
Anonymous
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>>18370523 throw the sheik in there too lol
