Brazilian JuJitsu legit looks like gay rape. It was created by a jap named Mitsuyo Maeda, who learned early-phase Judo from its founder (Jigoro Kano). However, Maeda was expelled from Japan for 2,400 acts of forced public homosexuality. So, he took his manraping skills to the jungles of Brazil, hoping to rape many exotic species in the rainforest. One day, while chasing monkeys, he found the Gracie brothers. I dont have to tell you what happened next. Rather than run away, the gracies decided to become his students, becoming proficient in the arts of homosexual rape. When their training was complete, Maeda excreted a 4-foot long turd on each of their tests, telling them it was their "brown belt." All the elder gracies still have those giant Rio steamers, in glass cases on their walls, as heirlooms to be passed on to their descendants. Truly, brazilian ju jitsu has a glorious history.
