>>19652408I'm a coward. Truth be told I've only had one girlfriend before her and we never even properly broke up. She just went away out of state for school and ghosted me over time. I guess that's why I no longer feel capable of falling in love anymore or maybe because I'm a deeply insecure narcissist. My wife isn't perfect but she's honestly very devoted to me even though I've grown to even despise her at time. Did I mention how I forced her to get an abortion because she has a long genetic bloodline of having autistic males? I'm sure if I grew up and learned to appreciate her I would be happy but until now I'm hopelessly waiting for any other woman to give me attention to get away from this lifeless husk of a marriage
