>"Yeah so, I've been in this business a long time. Debuted way back in Triassic, you had me, pterosaur, Smok, Coelcanth, and ammonite got a big push after getting nearly buried by Permian. But then suddenly, everyone started working this new 'dinosaur' style, bunch of spot monkeys damn near killed the entire business. I was old, hurt, and working with children.Paleogene saw where it was headed, they booked Extinctionmania V to take everything in a new direction, this big asteroid angle. I felt it was a good time to retire, so asked if I could be part of it, go out on a high, I'd do the honors of course. But coming out of the PPV all anyone talked about was 'did you see that crazy bump all the dinosaurs took?' Flippy shitters ended their own career to pop the smarks."
>"Anyway, a few million years go by, and man the business changes a LOT in that time. Then suddenly, this outlaw mudshow in the Scotland territory gimme a call. Homo sapiens is getting a big push, going over everybody, doing all these ridiculous gimmicks like 'technology' and 'civilisation', no idea how to work a habitat, but hey, it's drawing big. The booker asks what I'm doing, I told him I'm retired, but he says 'Don't worry, you wont have to step back in the ring, in fact, you wont even have to cut a promo'. I think he's ribbing me, but I could use the money, so I hear him out, he says 'We're bringing you in under a new gimmick, 'Nessie'", only the whole thing is just pre-tape hype vignettes. No match, no promo, no appearance, just hype vignettes and commentators being fed lines. I thought it was the dumbest gimmick I'd ever heard but it's easy work and this business is all the money and the miles. so I do it, and here we are now, I've drawn bigger houses and made more money on this run, than I did in Triassic, and North America books a new star Bigfoot with the same gimmick, and he's drawing dimes too. Work smarter not harder, smarks."
