* Castlevania music drops* >Ayo! The world is cold, better bundle up. I said, the world is cold, better bundle up! Ayo! The wo..
YO! YO! YO! CUT MY MUSIC DAWG! YO I SAID CUT IT! CUT THAT SHIT!
Yo, I got an important announcement to make. * clears throat* FUCK TONY KHAN, FUCK MOX, FUCK ORTIZ, FUCK SANTANA AND FUCK JERICHO!! *Crowd starts booing* PEOPLE! PEOPLE! GIMME A MINUTE! GIMME A MINUTE!
Look people, I gave my heart to this fed! I BLED FOR THIS FED AND FOR WHAT? FOR WHAT!? A SIDESHOW CARNY ACT ON DARK!? NAH! FUCK THAT, DAWG! I've worked Bingo halls with more heat than this place. Lemme tell ya, lemme tell ya something pahtnah, THE ONLY THING MORE ICE COLD THAN AEW IS THE FROZEN DILDO THAT WAS UP MY ASS WHEN I WAS BLOWING SAMMY GUEVARA IN THE SHOWER OUT BACK!! YEAH! IT'S TRUE DAWG, IT'S TRUE! I came to AEW to get that nut! I swallowed wrestlers whole! I went to Japan to drink the King's Load! NOW I WANT MORE! AEW was just the appetizer, NEW JAPAN IS THE MAIN COURSE!! OKADA! OKADA! LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME! *grabs the camera and shakes it violently* LOOK AT ME YOU YELLOW FUCK! I'M COMIN FOR DAT SUSHI NUT, DAWG! I'M GOIN BENIHANA ON DAT ASS!! WHEN I'M DONE, YOUR BALLS ARE GONNA BE AS DRIED AND WRINKLED AS CHRIS JERICHO'S!! AND TO ALL MY NEW JAPANESE FANS: OWARE..UH..WAAA..UHM..BIGU..NUTTU..MY..MY..ASSU..ER..AND MOUT..AH FUCK IT! HIT THE DRACULA MUSIC!!