>>5311418The story hook is a bit emaciated. For one, the only information that readers are given on the protagonist is their name and profession. Having a certain personal goal or motivation is critical for a quest, as it provides some direction for voters in the beginning when they're still unfamiliar with the world. Even something as straightforward as "you want the tome to cure a sick family member" or "you are a megalomaniac that wants the tome's power" helps dictate those important early choices. The macguffin, the Tome of Rok'shaman, is also a big question mark. Why do we want some musty old book, except perhaps its academic value? Is this a fun scholarly exercise, or is the protagonist willing to die trying to get the thing? Establishing things like these is important to drawing anons in.
Reading a few updates, I am of the opinion that you just need to keep writing. The experience will improve your prose with time. A post clearly detailing all of the uses and limits of alchemy will also help. More worldbuilding would also be welcome.
