>>6035578>>6035586>>6035615>>6035620>>6035689>>6035729>>6035754>>6035787"I will honor orc law and accept the role of chieftain," you announce to the gathered orcs, "As your new chieftain, I will civilize our tribe into becoming more human. It only makes sense. The old chief lost to a human, which means that humans and their ways are stronger than orcs."
"But humans diddle sheep!" one of the orcs protests.
Meanwhile, a female orc casually chops off the former chieftain Azov the Defiler's head and begins cooking it. You can't help but feel (1) lowkey disturbed by the casual cannibalism of their own kind, (2) notice the difference between Azov, a classic pig-like orc, and the greenskin sub-race that makes up the rest of the tribe, and (3) find yourself pondering how to defend the human race from sheep-diddling allegations.
> 1. Humans don't diddle sheep... well, a few do, but definitely not all of us!> 2. It's often said that humans diddle three sheep a year. But that's just a statistical error. The average human diddles zero sheep per year. Sheep-diddler Georg, who lives in Welshland and diddles over ten thousand a day, is an outlier and should not have been counted.> 3. That's just elven propaganda spread to make humans look bad.> 4. Ah, the old sheep-diddling myth. One guy gets caught, and suddenly we're all sheep diddlers.> 5. Well, if we’re comparing vices, at least we don't eat other humans.> 6. Sheep-diddling? That’s a rural problem. I'm more of a city guy.> _ 