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With a permanent marker and a free drink in hand, you waste no time in giving your adoring fans what they want! Downing your first cup of what tastes like beer, you quickly fall into a rhythm like you’ve been doing this shit your entire life: drink, sign, drink, sign. Like a well-oiled (or well-boozed in this case) machine, you barely flinch at the rabid horde of skeletons and their belongings: whether it’s a helmet, a cutlass, a gun, or even a bone, you approach each and every autograph with masterful flair!
Curlicue letters. Shoutouts and thankful messages. You even draw a few cat faces and hearts on some of them–they friggin’ <span class="mu-i">LOVE</span> it!
“<span class="mu-r">Holy cow, you’re still going!?</span>” Nats remarks as you empty another beer!
“Holy crap, you’re still going!?” Asks Art as Syb and Mitz watch in silent awe.
You don’t bother to respond–you’re in the groove, after all! Though a dull ache slowly spreads through your signing arm, you don’t falter, and before long the crowd around you thins as the skeletons make way for you to pass through!
“Thanks, kid!” Shouts one of your fans as your motorcade turns to head towards a <span class="mu-g">GARAGE</span> situated on the outskirts of the fort, “You da’ best!”
“Arrr, she be approachable fer’ one so famous!” Remarks a pirate skeleton!
“Stan’s da’ cat’s meow, baby!” Hoots a pompadour’d skeleton!
Giving your fans a few shots from the <span class="mu-g">GUN FINGERS,</span> you slump back into your seat as the signing frenzy finally catches up with you!
“Jeez, Stan–feels like I’m driving a movie star around…” Mitzi laughs from the front seat. “Say, can I get an autograph too after this?”
“Nice to see your deeds have finally caught up with you, isn’t it?” Sybil adds with pride as she pats your head! Damn right it is!
“Definitely worked out dat’ arm, too!” Ly announces as you approach the distant garage! “Not bad at all, kiddo!”
<span class="mu-b">TEMPORARY BUFF: AUTOGRAPHER’S ARM! FOR THE REST OF THE NIGHT YOU’LL GET A +5 BONEUS TO ANY ACTION REQUIRING YOUR RIGHT ARM! PHEW!</span>
As the fame-induced haze slowly fades along with the cheering behind you, you notice that in all the confusion and chaos, something ELSE was signed back there… and by that we mean <span class="mu-s">PLASTERED</span> with signatures!
<span class="mu-b">SO MUCH SO THAT IT’LL GET A PERMANENT +5 BUFF! WHAT IS IT, FOLKS?</span>
>YOUR BACKUUM!
>YOUR CHINCHILL PUMP-ACTION!
>YOUR ROCKET LAUNCHER!
>YOUR REMOTE-CONTROLLED DUCK!
>YOUR TELESCOPING MOP!
>YOUR EVENING SANITATION COORDINATOR CAP OR COVERALLS!
>ART!
>MITZI!
>SYBIL!
>WRITE-IN!
