Quoted By:
Eyes on the prize, damn it! Errr, eyes <span class="mu-i">off</span> the prize! But on the <span class="mu-i">OTHER</span> prize! SHIT!
Tearing your eyes away from the bouncing gremlin, you duck under the robot’s flying punch just in time to avoid having your head rearranged again! Safely underneath the killbot, the crowd goes quiet as you channel as much <span class="mu-g">GOODBOYNIUM</span> you can muster into your fist before bringing it crashing upwards into the robot’s mechanical guts with an ear-splitting <span class="mu-s">CRUNCH!</span>
Following through with a triumphant roar, you send your opponent flying out of the ring, over the pier, and about a whole football field’s length out to sea! As everyone watches the deathbot head to Davy Jones's Locker with a massive splash, you earn a moment of stunned silence before the pier erupts in cheers!
Before you can catch your breath, you feel a pint-sized missile crash into your side and cling to you like a rabid animal!
“TALBOT,” sputters Stan as she barely contains her excitement, “Y-you… that was <span class="mu-i">AWESOME!</span>”
Feeling her press her body against you as she covers your cheek in kisses, you can only respond with a dull ‘<span class="mu-i">eheheh…</span>’ as you feel your brain’s blood move, er…
<span class="mu-i">Other</span> places.
“Congrats, kid–that makes you the first winner so far!” Hobbling over with a fresh <span class="mu-g">UNICORN PLUSH,</span> Clarke holds it out for you and tips his hat! Errr, you stammer as you take the doll off his hands, sorry about that…
“Ehh, don’t mention it!” The old man snickers as he waves your apology away! “Just means I hafta’ fish ‘em out and make a few modifications… might need ta’ move shop too–you uh, you ain’t gonna press charges for the jaw, are ya?”
Nah, you shrug, but he might wanna keep this away from kids…
“Talbot! GIMME!”
Holding the doll over Stan’s head and teasing her with it, you relent after she kicks you in the shins a few times! OW!
“S-<span class="mu-i">sofft</span>...” Letting you go to hug her plush, Stan’s eyes light up with childlike wonder as she presses her cheek against the unicorn! Not bad, huh?
“Nope! Now <span class="mu-i">YOU</span> get to carry it for me!”
Shoving the prize into your unsuspecting hands, your date gives you a cheeky wink as she takes a few steps back towards the crowd!
“So…” She says with a mischievous smile, “Now that I’ve got my food, fun, and prize…”
<span class="mu-b">DATE RANK: MAGICAL!</span>
Beckoning you to follow, you take a step towards Stan before noticing an odd jar on the ground.
Huh… is that <span class="mu-g">PEANUT BUTTE-</span>
<span class="mu-b">ROLL ME 1d100 FOR REASONS! BEST OF 3!</span>
