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You don't even attempt to fire your gun. You'd barely have time to get a shot off at such close range, and your powder is soaking wet. Best to keep the beast at bay with the club-like stock. Eventually you are pushed up a cave formation- and then the creature takes the weapon from you. Now you're <span class="mu-i">screwed</span>.
Why did you run away from home? In this moment, you can't even <span class="mu-i">imagine</span> what you were thinking in going off to fight in a war. For who? The <span class="mu-i">King</span>? The King, rich and powerful, has whatever food or woman he wants- luckier and better then you in every way. What honor is there in that? Your Dad was right. This life is filled with pain and broken promises. And moreso- the <span class="mu-i">selfishness</span>. He said he was selfish for having you- but you feel guilt for leaving him and your mother- selfish. Then again, everything and everyone is <span class="mu-i"><span class="mu-s">purely acting for themselves</span></span>. No honor or love, just instincts- even this creature preparing to climb this rock and kill you is just doing this because it was born to do it.
You're so stupid. You should have gone home, focused on making as much money on yourself, stealing or killing for it if you had to. Nothing matters anyway. Nobody is watching. There is no God judging us. But at the same time, you realize, you won't get the chance to act on that belief. There is no God watching you here. Nobody is coming to save you. You will die here and nobody will care. You will feel pain and then end, and this creature will have a single moment of pleasure before it gets hungry again tomorrow.
You glance upwards in the cavernous chamber and see something you weren't expecting. Another huge drawing on the cavern ceiling- a massive circle. The circle of clouds, the symbol of the old religion. It strikes you in that moment as something of a joke. You have to consider how that was made- you'd have to climb that ceiling or put up a ladder what, dozens, no, <span class="mu-i">hundreds</span> of times to complete that drawing! And it's so perfectly round, so detailed. It makes you angry. Why would anyone go to the effort of making that? Making something like that for something that is not even real- you can't sell it, nobody will even <span class="mu-i">see</span> it! It's in a fucking cave!
What purpose does art or music or laughter even serve? If it doesn't help you get money or food or pussy, what is it worth? Clearly, somebody cared. They believed in something that isn't real. What a waste. You wish it wasn't a waste. You don't want to live like this anymore. But just a moment before you step off the stone towards the creature's waiting mouth, your body stops you- your own instincts betray your mind in a desperate bid to stay alive. <span class="mu-i">Anything but that</span>, it begs. Even making you do and say ridiculous things.
You clasp your hands together. Your voice shakes. <span class="mu-g">”God, if you're real, I'm sorry for what I've done. I don't deserve it, but I just want a second chance. If you're real, <span class="mu-i">please save me.</span>”</span>
