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Eloise makes a strange noise, and you cycle through a few possibilities (cough? indigestion?) before it processes as a snicker. You scowl. Monty does too. "No."
«There is no reason to press this inanity further.»
«Change the subject.»
You think it's an innocuous and perfectly reasonable question, but Eloise is still snickering. "Fine," you say defensively. "I just think it'd be cool if it were a manifestation of your magyck powers, but I guess it'll just have to be a, a normal, less-cool shadow ghost ooze arm, if that's what you—"
"It is." Monty looks down, then up, and his tone is different when he speaks again. "...A <span class="mu-i">less-cool...?</span>"
You hadn't thought that'd be a controversial statement. "Well, it's already cool, as-is, so— don't make that stupid face." He's raising his eyebrows. "Is there something not cool about a spooky monster arm? Even if it's not magyck, it's still— I mean, name something that makes it <span class="mu-i">not</span> cool, Monty. I dare you."
Eloise's snickering has escalated into choked laughter. Monty is at a loss for words. You flourish. "<span class="mu-i">See?</span> It is objectively— you <span class="mu-i">objectively</span> have a cool new arm, and it's weird you don't like it. I actually came in here to <span class="mu-i">congratulate</span> you about the arm, as a matter of fact. Congratulations!"
You were rather amazed at this clever excuse, but Monty averts his gaze. "Eloise?"
"...Yeah?" She wipes her eyes.
"What do you find funny about this?"
"What do I find <span class="mu-i">funny</span> about this? They say humor's born of incongruity—"
"I don't find it particularly funny myself." The fingers on Monty's spooky arm have balled up.
"Oh, I'm shocked, Mr. Manager! You always were known for your keen sense of humor."
"Eloise."
"And not at all for the log shoved directly up your ass." Her smile is feline. "Has anyone ever told you that maybe it's your pathological self-seriousness that—"
"<span class="mu-i">Eloise.</span>"
"—drives you fucking loony about once a month? If you let off steam laughing at, let's see, the kid crawling under the door to ask about your cool magic ghost arm—"
"I'm not a kid," you say. "And it's magyck, not—"
She ignores you. "—then maybe it wouldn't build to the point of unprovoked violence, hmm?"
You have the feeling this exchange has happened before, from the cloying lilt to Eloise's voice. Monty looks even less amused. "I wouldn't characterize it as unprovoked."
She kicks one leg over the other. "Tell that to the eyewitnesses."
«Charlotte.»
«You are exceedingly fortunate that this woman has drawn the attention off you.»
On one hand, yes. It's not as though you're frightened, or anything, (you are still dominating the situation), but it was only yesterday that you got strangled. And Monty's narrow expression is a strangling look if you've ever seen one.
(2/5)
