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The entity lowers its head down to 'stare' at you. "You are one now, Nicole. You doomed yourself to that fate."
"W-what?" You try to move your body but the echoes of your body feeling like it was lit on fire stops you from doing jack or shit.
"You grew too bright. Those outside of the ones who glow know about you. People's feelings, people's attention, melding into a gestalt that funnels around YOU." The entity steps a bit closer until it is towering over you, blocking any faint moonlight that is illuminating the empty streets. "Rituals need a catalyst. You were that one."
"And when the City loves you, what else can you but it's guardian? The people of the City need someone to hate, to love, to revere, to follow, to bend to. You were just the unlucky one to be picked. And you cracked. We exist to give meaning to otherwise meaningless ideas, Nicole."
Something inside you shifts.
>A light now shines deep inside your soul. A fundamental part of you will be awaken...eventually.
>SEEKER has been upgraded! You'll have a far easier time understanding the functions of a PARADIGM and you'll get exact numbers on how much development a SPARK ally has left.
>Another aspect of this upgrade will be unlocked in the future.
You slowly get back up onto your feet. You stare down at the entity with hate in your eyes. "Is this what I'm fated to become if I lose control? A beast? Why a deer of all things? Why do I even have these powers? I-" You stumble over your words.
You just woke up one day in this district, presumably with a family and a life before this Cleaner business. You have a past but...you realize how little it matters. And do YOU even matter, frankly? Or is it just the actions you do?
"Why am I like this?" You scramble to stuff something into your system to regain some fragment of control. Blue syrup, a syndicake. Something to let your mind THINK.
"<span class="mu-b">Because you're scared.</span>"
"Scared? Scared of WHAT?!" Your patience is already being tested by this fucking mockery of yourself. "Mind clarifying, Nicole? Are you going to be vague and mysterious about it? My fucking existence is already nothing but that, GIVE ME AN ANSWER!"
"That's exactly it. Will there be anything of you left? Will anyone even remember you once all is said and done? Will the bonds you make matter? Will the people you kill be mourned? Or will it all wash away?" Archivist slowly bends its legs down until it is sitting on the empty street, curled up in a remarkably comfy position for the situation.
>34!
It clicks for you. It's not a thought you're comfortable admitting to yourself but the only real reason you're doing any of this beyond your own self preservation...is because you had to.
Your whole life up to this point has been following the orders of a boss to make ends meet. Or fighting spooks who desperately want to snub you out of existence for the power you have. A lot of the decisions you've made and allies you've met only exist because of these influences.
