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But you wouldn't lie to yourself, that you would prefer it if the conditions were better. Or that, if there was no one in need of your help and you had time to yourself... that you'd desire to spend that time in luxury. There has to be some material benefit to being a goddess, after all, however little or much.
Still, you don't pick sides or choose a favorite. Let them create a wedge between themselves over your sake, so that you can better assume your rightful position and relationship with these mortals. The two pillars of power left standing in your way, the more they weaken each other the better... to an extent of course, you wouldn't permit either of them to totally collapse and risk the safety and lives of the people. Just weak enough for you to best make use of.
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You can at least talk your way into getting the night to yourself, which you actually personally wanted on top of benefiting for the extra time to decide how to proceed with the nobles and clergy. Besides, they have plenty to occupy themselves with; Eindward is no way close to having recovered or rebuilt from the battle. Even just this night, there's a lot of happy and hopeful and... rowdy people about town, that probably need watching over.
Yes, let them focus elsewhere, while you get some deserved and needed rest. But not before, within the hour, a squire coming to and from the castle returns your ankh. What a dear, you thank the young lad by healing a broken arm he received while defending the harbor, and request of your hosts that he can have his own room for the night as well. With all that taken care of then...
<span class="mu-r">"Alright... now to take care of this last thing... if only Usirin were here, for guidance..."</span>
From the privacy of your room and with the use of your ankh again, as the key of life you can gain access to the afterlife and the spiritual world. Not that you actually <span class="mu-i">need</span> the ankh, since your time in the underworld inherently colored your nature, so the aspect of death is part of who and what you are. But since it is not an aspect you really make use of or willingly accept, it helps to have some medium of the underworld to attune your divinity with; in this case the ankh.
So sitting on the bed in godly meditation, gripping the silver key to your chest, eventually the sickly pale aura gradually creeps in from all around and overtakes the world. Not any actual effect on the mortal world around you, just that you are now perceiving the afterlife as it is; an eerie and grim reflection of the living world. If any mortal walked into your room they'd simply find you sitting on the bed, but for you, now you find yourself in that other world. And from your past experience, and altered nature, you should be able to navigate it now without difficulty.
