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The power of the COOL IT rings true–for a few brief moments, there is only silence.
Welp, that was boring. ART! Snatching the radio out of your pocket and sending Lil’ Stanley flying in the process, you press the call button down and ask for a ‘SIPRAT’! Status Report!
“Stan?” Art asks in that nasally and perpetually SWEATY voice of his, “Is… is Sybbie okay?”
Yes, you groan, rolling your eyes at the girl in question, and if he calls her that while you’re listening ever again you’re gonna give him a wedgie!
“Oh thank GOD…” He remarks, knowing better than to respond to your threats. “Christ, Stan–we saw that explosion from HERE–please tell me that took care of the witch.”
No, you frown, but it looked pretty cool, right?
“Hell YEA it did!” Shouts Eddie from somewhere in the background!
“Hi, Stan.” Adds Gus.
“Yea, it was pretty cool I guess.” Art sighs, clearly not as enthused as his counterparts. “Was it at least for a good reason, or-”
“It was either that or thermonuclear annihilation.” Sybil cuts in, craning her neck closer to the radio from over your shoulder. “Also, hi Artie. Glad you’re okay.”
“Eheheh… Y-you too…”
They can sext later, okay!? You asked for their status, like, four paragraphs ago–why was he so snippy earlier anyways? Is he MANstruating, or something?
“I’m not ‘manstruating’, no.” Art growls, voice instantly losing its bashfulness. “That museum was a SHITSHOW, Stan–you don’t even know!”
He’s right, you counter in an increasingly irritated tone, and that’s why he’s ASKING him! Jesus, did he take ‘Piss Stan Off’ Lessons from Talbot or something?
“Are he and Mitzi okay?” Tucker asks. “They weren’t caught in the blast, right?”
They’re peachy, alright? Now shut up for a second and answer your question already! Also, hi Gus, Ed, and Tuck.
“Well…” Art begins, winding up for a long story, “It went a little something like this…”
And NO FLASHBACKS, damn it! You’ve got shit to do!
“... Fine. Don’t see why YOU get a monopoly on them, though.”
If he wants flashbacks so much, he can get his OWN quest! Now TALK!
>CONTD.
