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The next hour or so is an adrenaline-packed blur–though you start off with the roller coaster and the bumper cars, they just don’t scratch that itch you have for excitement! Sure, you and Talbot end up bonding a little when you teach a few kids some manners after they interrupt your <span class="mu-r">BUMPER DUEL,</span> but it turns out once you’ve spent a week or so defying death… carnival rides just don’t really <span class="mu-i">do</span> it!
“Stupid <span class="mu-i">kidss</span>...” Grumbles Talbot as the two of you retreat from the bumper cars shortly before pier security arrives, “always hidin’ behind their dumb <span class="mu-i">PARENTS</span> when the heat comes down!”
That reminds you, you reply as you make your way towards the <span class="mu-g">FERRIS WHEEL,</span> what are his parents like? They cool after everything that happened?
“Mom’s okay,” grunts your date, clearly not keen on discussing it much further, “she was outta’ town when it all went down… and dad?” Your bodyguard’s face darkens a bit at the mention of the word. “... he was never around to begin with.”
Oh, you stammer as you notice the emotional landmine you’re about to step on, that’s, uh… that sucks…
“Don’t worry about it, Stan–you didn’t know an’ I never really brought it up.” Replies your date with an apologetic smile forming on his face. “Shit, <span class="mu-i">I’m</span> the one who oughta’ be sorry getting all glum and crap during our d-<span class="mu-s">HOLY CRAP!</span>”
Instinctively diving to the side, you end up in a heap of old beer crates before realizing you aren’t in mortal danger. What the <span class="mu-i">HELL</span>, man!? You can’t just shout like that, you snarl as you quickly smooth out your <span class="mu-g">SLINKY DRESS</span>, you’ve got, like, ‘<span class="mu-i">PETEY EXDEE</span>’ or whatever the name is!
“Sorry,” Stammers Talbot as he helps you to your feet, “But <span class="mu-s">LOOK!</span> You didn’t tell me they had one of <span class="mu-s">THOSE!</span>”
Following Talbot’s hand, your jaw drops as you realize what he’s pointing at–the unruly brother of the <span class="mu-g">FERRIS WHEEL</span> who drinks <span class="mu-r">MALT LIQUOR</span> and starts fights at bars–you’re talking about a ride with <span class="mu-i">REAL</span> chest hair here, people! You’re talking about…
<span class="mu-r">THE ZIPPER!</span>
Still flabbergasted by the surprise attraction, you stammer out a response as best you can: you… you didn’t know they had one!
“Well shit, dork, screw the <span class="mu-g">FERRIS WHEEL–</span> let’s GO!”
Taking your hand in his, your date barrels through the few people waiting in line and secures both of you a seat!
“Better not lose your lunch!” Jokes Talbot as he straps into the seat next to you in the basket! “Man, talk about lucky, huh!?”
He’s telling YOU! <span class="mu-g">FERRIS WHEELS</span> are for chumps anyways–and you’re not about to puke on a baby ride like this!
<span class="mu-b">ROLL ME 1d100+5(+5 FAVORED RIDE, +5 DATE RANK BONEUS, -5 DATE JITTERS) TO NOT HORK ALL OVER THE PLACE LIKE A BITCH! I’LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS!</span>
