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"I'm sorry." That's the first thing that comes out of your mouth and by the looks of it, Ashley is going to maul you for the half assed apology. "I know that doesn't absolve me of anything but I'm sorry. Do you think I enjoy making people around me worry? To feel like this?"
"I get that, I really do." Ashley is clearly trying to force herself to stay calm and level headed. For your own sake if nothing else. "It's just every single time I work with you, some fucking psychic death spiral bullshit happens and I get hit in the crossfires."
"Oh! Inane psychic bullshit!" Your eye twitches for a brief moment. "You think I enjoy losing my god damn mind every time I use my powers? News flash, it sucks for me too! But every single mission I've been on, I needed them to survive." You step right up to Ashley with a snarl growing on your face.
"Ace Strikers, I used puppeteering and telekinesis to win the fights we were in! Casino, I used my mind reading to get valuable information! Today, puppeteering and mind reading and telekinesis all helped in keeping up ALIVE! I'm fucking sorry that I sometimes go a bit crazy but AT LEAST WE'RE FUCKING ALIVE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT IT, ASHLEY!"
Before she even has time to say anything else, you keep on going. "AND FUCK! YOU THINK I LIKE HAVING SPOOKS HUNTING ME DOWN? YOU THINK I WANT EVERYONE I REMOTELY TALK TO IS PUT ON A GLOWIE BLACKLIST? IT FUCKING SUCKS FOR ME TOO, ASHLEY!"
[UNSTABLE] Something is running down your face. Wet and warm. You feel a burning, seething heat in your antlers. Your head is FUCKING THROBBING.
"It's a catch god damn twenty two! I don't use my powers, we die. If I do use them, glowies hunt after me and everyone I fucking care about! What else CAN I do? I-I'm fucking sorry that I am the way I am but I'm just trying my best, okay?" You choke out as you try, in sheer futility, to keep yourself under control.
The two of you just stand there in silence, staring down at each other. Lex tries his best to say something but anything that comes out of his mouth comes out as a confused, hesitant murmur.
"Fuck." Ashley hisses through clenched teeth. "I. Yeah, yeah, I get that. I. Can I be honest with you?" All you can do is nod while trying your best to choke back a sob. Ashley sits back down, leaning against one of the many cargo crates.
"I'm just scared. I can't really name the last time I ever felt like this. Sure, I get worried about whether my next performance is going to be good but it's nothing like this."
"A-again, I'm trying, Ashley, I really-"
"I know. It's just...that whole thing about anomalies and concepts and after hearing about Benedict, I just wonder. What if I ended up like you two? What if I end up as some barely holding together psychic mess or, god forbid, an anomaly?"
"What?" Lex makes a noise half between a laugh and a grunt. "Ash, bud, not to insult Bene or Nicky but they're outliers. You're not going to end up like them."
"No. I could've." Ashley chuckles to herself.
