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Well, you continue, holding firm under her discerning and slightly buzzed eyes, you didn’t really wanna say it in front of the other assholes–she knows how <span class="mu-i">they</span> get!
“Boy, do I!” She smirks as she crunches on the last remaining deep-fried ice cream cone, “Now shaddap and get to the point already or I’ll kick you off the pier!”
Okay, <span class="mu-i">OKAY</span>, you groan as you help yourself to another chunk of funnel cake, you’ll just come out and say it!
You feel your throat seize up as you struggle to get your words out, but you persevere! It’s for Stan, damn it!
<span class="mu-s">THANK YOU AGAIN,</span> you exclaim!
Stan stares at you as she finishes off the ice cream cone before idly twirling a finger through her hair! “... hmmmm... For what?”
This BITCH!
Listen, you hiss as you whiteknuckle the sides of the table and struggle to remain humble, she… she’s a god<span class="mu-i">DAMN</span> rockstar, okay? She could have taken you out back when you were trying to murder her… and she <span class="mu-i">should’ve–</span>literally every moment you were stomping around and crashing through walls you wanted nothing more than to kill her! You <span class="mu-i">FANTASIZED</span> about it!
“Woah…” Mutters Stan with a mixture of disbelief and genuine interest, “Did, uh… did you have, like, a dream kill?”
You were torn between chucking her off a cliff and onto a really pointy rock and punching her head off and through a basketball hoop, but that’s not important now! Point is, you continue, is that when you gave her nothing but bullshit, she saw something in you… something that led her to use some crazy powerful, once-in-a-lifetime artifact on your stupid ass… and she didn’t even know it would work!
“Well…” Stan replies with a sheepish giggle, “I mean… it probably would’ve-”
And when you turned on her and tried to kill her after spending the night together, you conclude, she risked everyone’s lives including her own to bring you back… and now? Here we are.
“... yea,” She nods with a genuinely-pleased look on her face, “Here we are…”
That’s her <span class="mu-i">real</span> power right there, you conclude, taking another swig of beer to stay on a roll, being <span class="mu-s">awesome</span> to people. Living, dead, friends, enemies… you’re God’s greatest gift to mankind, Stan… and to me.
Bracing for the inevitable volley of potatoes, you dare to look out from behind the shield you’ve formed from your arms and find your date just… just <span class="mu-i">sitting</span> there.
Staring.
<span class="mu-b">DATE RANK: AMAZING!</span>
And, uh, you add with a smirk, while we’re on the subject… it would have been a <span class="mu-i">LOT</span> better waking up next to you instead of as a puppet!
>CONTD.