>>5374390Following in the security guard’s cowardly footsteps, you scale the remaining steps and enter <span class="mu-g">LIFE SUPPORT</span> in all its steamy, muggy splendor. Snaking through the maze of colossal machines, you’re just in time to hear a faint whimper just around the corner before it’s cut short by a gut-wrenching ‘<span class="mu-i">SSHCK!</span>’
You peek around the bend just in time to watch the bodies of the employees of the month topple to the metal floor in perfect sync–their helmeted heads idly rolling through the communal pool of blood forming beneath them.
“Y’know, those articles in <span class="mu-i">BUSINESS WEEKLY</span> were right–you just <span class="mu-i">can’t</span> find good help these days!”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_bIiXPPEm4AFollowing the familiar androgynous voice upwards, you find <span class="mu-r">SONNY</span> sitting on a catwalk railing idly stretching her claw. Upon noticing you staring, she gives you her trademark Cheshire grin.
“And surprise, surprise: you managed to escape! See, I <span class="mu-i">knew</span> I should have done <span class="mu-i">something</span> about those hamstrings of yours… rookie move…”
No, you snarl as you point an accusing finger in her direction, <span class="mu-i">she’s</span> the one making the rookie moves!
“Yep, just said that.”
Yea, well… i-it’s <span class="mu-i">over</span>, Sonny! You’re <span class="mu-s">DONE!</span> Roll credits! No post-credit scenes allowed!
“Very astute, Stan!” She snickers as one of her impeccably-shined loafers falls off revealing a long, shining blade in place of her missing leg, “Finished the preparations up <span class="mu-i">minutes</span> ago, actually! Punctuality never was your strong suit, was it?”
Blinking in confusion, you watch as she points her finger towards the diced terminals sitting behind her. “Now I’ve never really been an <span class="mu-i">exact numbers</span> person, but in a few minutes this bunker’s gonna heat up like a slow-cooker… which means we have <span class="mu-i">just</span> enough time for a little fun… so,” she purrs, raising a blonde eyebrow your way with unwelcome interest, “what’ll it be? <span class="mu-i">Truth or Dare?</span> Pillow Fight? Ooh, Investment Tips and Racy Massages?”
Firing your <span class="mu-g">N4 RIFLE</span> from the hip, you watch in disbelief as Sunny leans away from the bullets about as easily as one would dodge a beach ball drifting their way!
“<span class="mu-i">That’s</span> a fun one too… okay, Stan!” Twirling the <span class="mu-g">MAGIC REMOTE</span> in her claw, your boss makes a show of stuffing it into her breast pocket as a sinister chuckle escapes her throat! “Wouldn’t want to finish <span class="mu-i">too</span> early, would we?”
Rising from her seat, the boss stands atop the railing with both arms spread outwards as if to give you a hug!
“Go on then–I’ll even let <span class="mu-i">you</span> take the first shot!”
“Careful, kiddo…” Ly warns as Sunny shoots you a toothy grin, “Dis’ one’s tricky…”
<span class="mu-b">ROLL ME 1d100 TO STRIKE FIRST AND STRIKE FAST! I’LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS!</span>
