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You start your car and begin your drive over to the gun range. You take a deep breath and another for good measure, and you reluctantly dial your wife's number. Skyler answers, some noise audible in the background.
"Walt?"
"Hey, honey. What's going on there? I hear noises."
"Oh, it's just Junior watching TV."
"Wasn't he supposed to be doing homework? That's what he told me a minute ago."
"Really?" You know that voice. That's the voice only a stern mother could have. "Honey, what's this I hear about you having homework to do?" There's a pause, and then Skyler returns.
"Oh, he says he's watching TV for an assignment for his class." Yeah, right. You were a kid once too.
"What class?" Skyler parrots your question to Walt Jr. Another pause.
"Language Arts." You call bullshit. You'll talk to him when you get back home.
"Anyway, why'd you call, Walt?" Oh God, here we go.
"Well, I wanted to tell you, as an honest and communicative husband, that I... decided not to work at the car wash today." There's another pause, but this one is... tense.
"Okay. Why did you do that?" Skyler's casual tone has disappeared, replaced with one with a more interrogative inflection.
"Look, Skyler, I just couldn't stand the idea of spending my birthday getting humiliated at work. I just know that if I went, he'd force me to wipe down the cars. I'm pretty sure Enzo was planning on quitting anyw—" Skyler interrupts.
"Walt, that's not a good enough reason."
"But—"
"I told you to come home on time, not to skip work entirely. You're not excused from your responsibilities just because it's your birthday." You vaguely remember hearing this from someone else. "And what's this about you not showing up to school on time?" What? Did Junior rat you out?
"You heard?"
"Carmen left a message. Seemed pretty upset to me." Oh, right. Carmen. "What's going on Walt?" You sigh.
"Skyler, I promise you. This was just a one time thing. I was feeling impulsive." It's Skyler's turn to sigh.
"Believe it or not, I'm glad that you were," she says. "It's rare to hear about you being spontaneous. But you have to be more mindful. Speaking of which..." You stifle a groan. The nagging never ends. "...you used the Mastercard again at... Staples? $15.88?" This does ring a bell.
