Quoted By:
You are a goblin. An irrefutably evil, cruel, disgusting and green creature. Behind your beady black eyes lies no strength of character, no purity, and no soul. You are a disgusting and foul little thing.
Well... that was the consensus surrounding goblins for centuries but amongst the academic world there is an oft-maligned but growing movement surrounding goblin studies. Professor Zolar of the prestigious MIT (Magic Institute of Temporal) conducted an intense field study of goblin tribes and hypothesized that goblins were nurtured rather than born into evil.
To test this theory he would travel to various goblin tribes and slaughter the entire tribe except for a singular goblin child. If the child cried and wailed for the loss of their people and family that means it has empathy. If not, then it's evil.
This simple experiment was conducted hundreds of times destroying entire cultures, languages, and rich oral histories, and vivid traditional art. At the end professor Zolar concluded with statistical significance that goblins were in fact not naturally born evil to great acclaim and received the Nobel prize in monster studies along with great funding.
His next great experiment is to raise a goblin from birth to adulthood and nurture him to be a loving, exemplary, and GOOD goblin/person. He rented out a great mansion, hired innumerable servants, stockpiled nutritious food and recruited the greatest minds of the Imperial Empire for this purpose.
The goblin will be raised like a king.
That goblin is not you, however. Instead you are the hireling of a decidedly less successful, less intelligent, and more scrupulous "rival" professor named Girgga. Girggas was a peer of Zolar as an undergrad but because of his focus on trying (and failing) to pick up Elf sorority girls he quickly got left behind Zolar in grades, internships, and connections. He was left behind and took up an nontenured track position as a professor of introductory goblinoid studies at a crime-ridden, inbred, idiotic party school on the outskirts of the empire called the University of Alabama. And after Zolar had married his Elf crush that was from the same department he vowed eternal revenge.
Once news of Zolar's new experiment came out he had drunkenly proclaimed that he had secretly been raising a goblin long before Zolar and was going to shock the world to the riotous laughter of his peers.
He was of course lying, but Girggas has always had a tenuous relationship with the truth and ended up recruiting you.
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