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Having worked in and subsisted primarily off of deep-fried fast food for the last few years of your life, you know better than most how long a man can linger on a toilet… but you’re not in the business of leaving loose ends lying around… not anymore, anyways–just look at that asshole <span class="mu-r">SALTY SUUTZ!</span>
Taking your position at your new pal Gordi’s side, you crack your knuckles as you meet the guard’s confused and, quite frankly, mortified stare with a cold, impassive glare of your own!
One more thing, Gord, you mutter, you’re not a ‘<span class="mu-i">MISS</span>’!
NAP TIME.
“... What are you doing?”
About a minute later you haven’t a clue! It’s hard enough rocking someone to sleep while they’re sitting… but it’s another thing entirely when they’re shi-
<span class="mu-s">THWOMP!</span>
Always the pragmatic, Volka solves the problem with a decisive tail-smack to the poor guard’s gob! Thanks, Volk!
“S’what I do…” She replies with a forced smile! “So jus’ ta’ be clear: you’re gonna pretend to be his <span class="mu-i">brother?</span>”
Close, you shrug as you try your best to orient Gordi so that he doesn’t fall, you’re gonna act like <span class="mu-i">him</span>! You’ll march them up to Rolo’s place as if you caught them, and by the time he figures out what’s happening, he’ll be deep-fried and ready to serve!
“And if he clocks us?” Asks TT as sends an appraising glance your way.
You dunno… jump out the booth? Torch the way in? You’ll improvise! Taking Gordi’s <span class="mu-b">ROD</span> in hand… heheh… you motion your pals to get marching! With luck you’ll find some guards to show you the rest of the way!
Luckily you don’t need to wait long… no sooner do you emerge from the bathroom does a patrol swing around the corner–the Skogs and Moleggs about one second away from lighting you and your pals up before you diffuse the situation!
<span class="mu-i">PHEW</span>, you groan as you make a show of kicking the bathroom door shut, you’d think these jerks would have the decency to light some incense or something!
“Da’ Hell’s goin’ on here?” Mutters one of the Skogs! “Who’re these!?”
The Kitchen Kooks, you reply! Torched a guest? Tried to get away with it?
“Rrrrgh! A-and I’d do it again!” Snarls Volka like a toddler trying to act scary, “Mmmm, <span class="mu-i">flesh!</span>”
“Ugh…” Your new coworker replies with a derisive snort, “Hate Skogs like these… perpetuatin’ stereotypes…” Stretching his massive shoulders, the Skog shrugs at the rest of his patrol. “Ain’t dis’ a shame… I was hopin’ ta’ break a few bones… or at least get an eye ta’ chew on…”
“Let’s get ‘em to the boss,” Adds a Chytree as his glowing eyes wash over you like searchlights, “Lead the way, hotshot!”
Oh uh… c-can they lead the way? You’re uh… you wanna make sure they don’t run…
>CONTD.
