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Rolled 9, 8, 10, 17, 4, 17, 9, 12, 17, 1 = 104 (10d20)
Ohh. Wants his girly's goldy mally, wot he left by the door to his room.
You move it juuuust away.
>nooooope
>lal
Ooh, the pain onniz face, just before his light fades! Fuggen groose bumpz, izza izza! Now yez alluz gotta gudd 'un to tell ovva gobboys over eatz n swiggs. If yez evva have a mobb again.
Oh well!
You yoink the Holy Moley Mally, Holy Moley Book, shove everfin in wiv Sordyfagg's body innada Pouch.
Then you post Moar Ow as lookout while you go about cleaning up Ͳ, sopping up the blood with dry rags, then mopping up with wet rags. You use yez keen gobby schnozz to sniff out droplets wot got splatted where you carnt see, then you splash it wiv dirty soap water and mop again. Knowing that Towser exists is reason enough for the extra work.
If you ever fight that fleafactory mogger it will be on your terms.
All done, you put the table, chairs, and etc in the scullery back proppa-like, and get to lewtn Sordyfagg's room.
°°°
There's a finer touch needed when you lewtz someone wots dedd and supposed not to be. Yez carnt take everfin dat don't make sense for their taking.
Like the whole shelf of sorted gimgams n gubbins. Like all the big fatty toily books wivva gold edging on the other shelf.
But the things he might take if he went out, like hiz Sord n belts, hiz smol moneys, iron brims, smol helff potts onna belt bag, sum good levva vests, you bag.
Things that other people shouldn't know about, you bag: couple goldy rings inna velvy box, four crystal bottles of BIG booz, one teeny black corked bottle wivva drippy noif label, smellz reeeely spikey noisop nogrog, an extra fikk pot wiv purple speckles in, fings like that.
And of course, the big keyhoop you've seen him go about with.
Without the Wondrous Pillager Pouch it would have taken at least a mobb of ten to haul all that safely into the night.
The night's only half over; it's not even moon-drop yet. But yez don't want to stick here long, just in case.
Yez wantza getz back, patch up, n count lewts!
Yez gonna give Seafood his divvy, of course: one and half of the BIG boozes, you bury the rest, savem for badder days, the Sord n Mally, the big purp pot.
But the rest is YOUrs!
QM rollan lewts
