Quoted By:
Your name, at least for this scrap, is <span class="mu-s">TALBOT SCHUMER,</span> an-
<span class="mu-s">CLANG!</span>
OooOh, <span class="mu-i">FUUUCK!</span>
Distracted by Stan’s <span class="mu-b">NICE RACK,</span> you take a hit like a goddamn <span class="mu-s">jackhammer</span> to the jaw! Stumbling backwards into the ropes, the crowd gives you a sympathetic ‘<span class="mu-i">OOoOOH!</span>’ as Stan’s face darkens a bit! Aw <span class="mu-i">CRAP,</span> that’s no way to start a fight!
“<span class="mu-s">ONE POINT FOR OLE’ DUSTER!</span>” announces the MC as he rings a rusty bell next to the prize cabinet! “<span class="mu-s">KEEP FIGHTIN’ LIKE THAT, KID!</span>”
Spitting a gob of blood onto the ring, you square up just in time to catch your opponent rushing you with a flurry of piston punches! This time you’re ready, though, and while you’re nowhere near as speedy as Stan i-well, <span class="mu-i">was</span>, you manage to swat the robot’s gloves out of the way long enough to get a haymaker across the robot’s steel jaw!
Clarke doesn’t need to ring a bell for that one! Sending the robot’s head spinning on its axis with a loud ‘<span class="mu-s">CLANG,</span>’ the boxer bot keeps up the pressure and wades into the fray even though he’s still spinning! Using its momentum to his advantage, <span class="mu-r">THE DUSTER</span> jabs at your chest a few times before leaning in to give you a <span class="mu-r">SPINNING HEADBUTT!</span> That can’t be legal!
… for <span class="mu-s">HIM</span>, at least! If you were any other jerk you’d probably step aside or <span class="mu-i">dodge</span> or some crap like that, but you’re <span class="mu-s">TALBOT SCHUMER,</span> in case everyone forgot, and you don’t dodge!
Instead, you take the opportunity to fix the bot’s head! Kicking the automaton back with your <span class="mu-g">MIGHTY SNEAKER,</span> you use the split second to deliver an uppercut to the robot’s jaw again!
<span class="mu-s">CLANG!</span>
The crowd roars as you teach the machine a <span class="mu-i">second</span> lesson, proving once again that there’s no mechanical problem you can’t fix by beating the hell outta’ it! “THAT’S IT, TALBIE!” Roars Stan as she hops up and down alongside the ring! “MURDER ‘EM!”
She just <span class="mu-i">had</span> to jump around in a tight dress, didn’t she? Distracted once more, you feel your opponent rushing in to take advantage of the situation once again!
<span class="mu-b">ROLL ME 1d100(+5 TALBOT TOUGHNESS, +5 ONE MORE POINT, +10 STAN’S WATCHING, -10 MURDER MODE, -5 OW, MY JAW!, -5 STAN’S… JUMPING…) TO GET DAT’ POINT! I’LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS!</span>