You’re <span class="mu-s">STANLEY PARBLE</span>: a girl with a weird name and an even weirder tale: after a centuries-old lich woke up during your graveyard shift at the <span class="mu-g">GOOD BOY DOGGIE BONE FACTORY</span>, your simple life of janitorial work became a bit more… Complicated.

Sure, you became pals with your now-sentient skeleton (you named him <span class="mu-g">LY</span>) AND gained some nifty <span class="mu-b">SUPER POWERS</span> from eating <span class="mu-b">MAGICAL BONE MARROW</span>, but that doesn’t change the fact that your hometown of <span class="mu-g">CLEARWATER, CALIFORNIA</span> is overrun by <span class="mu-r">HOMICIDAL SKELETONS!</span> Even worse, the guy in charge is dead-set on taking over the rest of the world while he’s at it! <span class="mu-s">NOT COOL!</span>

After a particularly close encounter with the reaper following a psychedelic jaunt through several ‘alternate dimensions’, you were able to reconvene with your pals <span class="mu-g">EDDIE, ART,</span> and <span class="mu-g">MARSHAL BURTON PARBLE–</span> the latter being one of the more pleasant surprises sprung upon you in the last few days. Reunited and rejuvenated, you and your posse soon tracked down the leader of the <span class="mu-r">BLACK EYE GANG</span> and one of the lich’s last remaining <span class="mu-r">LIEUTENANTS: CLAYTON BLACK.</span> Though he put up an admirable fight thanks to his mastery of illusions and the infamous <span class="mu-r">MERCER BROTHERS,</span> the end result was the same: you kicked his bony ass!

Following another charming encounter with your extremely-annoying coworker <span class="mu-r">BORIS PONDEROSA,</span> you and your pals managed to escape more or less intact enough to attend a party held in your honor courtesy of the skeletal citizens of <span class="mu-g">JOPLIN:</span> a ghost town just outside <span class="mu-g">CLEARWATER</span> city limits. Aside from the usual drunken revelry, your antics also took you to a strange theater–the <span class="mu-b">FUTURE</span> being the main attraction! Haunted by a series of flashbulb premonitions, you found solace in beating the stuffing out of your friends in a good-natured bar fight!

The victory, however, went to your fellow janitor and ex-hulking-skeletal-golem <span class="mu-g">TALBOT SCHUMER,</span> but only cuz’ you let him! Escorting you back to your lodgings for the night, things got a little… <span class="mu-i">complicated</span> when both of you let down your thorny walls. The details are sparse, but you’re pretty sure you only kissed him on the cheek. Thank <span class="mu-i">GOD.</span>

There’s no rest for the wicked, however, and after a night of shock-induced paralysis you learned that several issues require your delicate touch, most of them in the vicinity of <span class="mu-r">THE LODGE–</span> the massive survival bunker currently run by your company. Before you can rush off, however, an old friend and purveyor of nifty goods appears on the horizon… chased by what sounds like an army of cars!

Still nursing a hangover and itchin’ for a fight, THIS is where your story continues...
https://youtu.be/_wiwdlu-Zg0