You are a financially devastated and chicken shit poor DIRT FARMER living in the humble farming hamlet of FUCK OFF NOWHERE which is in the kingdom of KINGDOMLOT

FUCK OFF NOWHERE is a quaint, quiet place. And if you were a weaker man you might even consider it a nice place to live.

However, you are a FARMER. The pure opposite of weakness. You plow corn, you rip potatoes out of the ground, you could cut off the kingdom's food supply no problem. You are a powerhouse of strength and sheer fucking will.

It is in your nature, YOU CRAVE BLOOD, YOU CRAVE BABES, AND YOU CRAVE LOOT

Luckily for you, you live in a generic fantasy setting. Goblins, Orcs, Elves, Dwarves, the whole nine yards.

Blood, Babes, and Loot are commonplace out here provided you're man enough to take what's yours.

It's time to get out of this village and get going. The Kingdomlot castle sits in the distance, The I-95 is to the left, but you can go anywhere you wish. The rules need not apply to a FARMER.

>This quest was made for the sole purpose of dicking around. A plot may form, who knows. Write-Ins heavily encouraged. Let's have a good time


WHAT WILL YOU DO:
>Write In

>Hang around FUCKOFF nowhere some more

>Keep plowing the Fields

>Set off towards Kingdomlot Castle

>Brave the treacherous I-95

>Go off into the woods, where dungeons, caves,bandits, and goblins are a plenty