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Quoted By: >>5204151 >>5204157 >>5204159 >>5204167 >>5204169 >>5204178 >>5204189 >>5204221 >>5204272 >>5204280 >>5204399
You are a genie. A wondrous being that grants wishes that are beyond a person's wildest dreams. Well... that's at least what humans think you are. You're actually more akin to a demon, really. Whenever a puny human makes a wish you take a part of their soul and take its essence for yourself. They would know if they read the fine print of the genie contract that you give them when they uncork your bottle.
It's a good gig all things considered, but lately you've been getting pretty tired of it. Eating the millionth human soul isn't really appealing anymore to you, and human wishes are just boring to you now. Sure the first god-emperor you helped make was fun, but at this point you've made at least 6 of them. If they're going to make a wish could they stand to make it interesting? It's always immortality, power, love and other fleeting human things. It's all so tedious now and your contract with the devil that granted you your wish powers lasts another 100,000 years.
All you want to do is ride out your contract with the devil inside your nice air-conditioned bottle. However, humans keep disturbing your rest with their stupid fucking wishes. You've had enough. You may be bound to grant their wishes, but that doesn't mean you have to be nice about it. If you can find some way to kill the humans using their wishes you could probably cut your work time in half, you just have to be an asshole genie.
The first unfortunate recipient of your malicious compliance is what seems to be a dehydrated pilgrim making his way to the holy land. He regards your presence with awe and mutters a prayer which you scoff at, you are certainly not a holy being. Chuckling a little bit at his misguided prayer you quickly do your rehearsed "three wish speech" and hand him your contract (which he signs with a bloody fingerprint even though he clearly can't read). Now that you've finished your contractually obligated speech and contract-handing you can get up to mischief to finish this as fast as possible. You could try to convince him to fuck off and null the contract or listen to his wish and then kill him through malicious compliance. The first way would be faster but much harder.
What do?
>Scream REALLY LOUD whenever he tries to make a wish so he can't finish and leaves in frustration.
>Say blasphemous things until he leaves in disgust.
>Listen to his wish
>Write in
It's a good gig all things considered, but lately you've been getting pretty tired of it. Eating the millionth human soul isn't really appealing anymore to you, and human wishes are just boring to you now. Sure the first god-emperor you helped make was fun, but at this point you've made at least 6 of them. If they're going to make a wish could they stand to make it interesting? It's always immortality, power, love and other fleeting human things. It's all so tedious now and your contract with the devil that granted you your wish powers lasts another 100,000 years.
All you want to do is ride out your contract with the devil inside your nice air-conditioned bottle. However, humans keep disturbing your rest with their stupid fucking wishes. You've had enough. You may be bound to grant their wishes, but that doesn't mean you have to be nice about it. If you can find some way to kill the humans using their wishes you could probably cut your work time in half, you just have to be an asshole genie.
The first unfortunate recipient of your malicious compliance is what seems to be a dehydrated pilgrim making his way to the holy land. He regards your presence with awe and mutters a prayer which you scoff at, you are certainly not a holy being. Chuckling a little bit at his misguided prayer you quickly do your rehearsed "three wish speech" and hand him your contract (which he signs with a bloody fingerprint even though he clearly can't read). Now that you've finished your contractually obligated speech and contract-handing you can get up to mischief to finish this as fast as possible. You could try to convince him to fuck off and null the contract or listen to his wish and then kill him through malicious compliance. The first way would be faster but much harder.
What do?
>Scream REALLY LOUD whenever he tries to make a wish so he can't finish and leaves in frustration.
>Say blasphemous things until he leaves in disgust.
>Listen to his wish
>Write in
