>>5262505 Uhh... No... I'm bigdicknerdboii, totally different guy. Who's this feet smeller guy? He sounds like quite the chap, whomever he is.>>5262693>>5262851>>5262875>>5262983Lunch: 3, Spit: 2 (Rolls: 62, 57, 2, 12 - Medium/Poor)
Extraterrestrials: 2 (+1 w/ Parents), Rick: 1, Abandoned: 1
Ditch the dork: 3, Help him out: 1, Party!!!: 1 (Rolls: 17, 29, 37, 33 - Poor)
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The beautiful, fertile woman demands you leave the office, but you merely grab her by the wrist and tell her you'll buy her a root beer float and chili cheese Fritos boat at A&W.
She seriously doesn't want to go, so it takes a lot of force!! She stops fighting when she starts crying. Stupid girls don't know how to roughhouse OR appreciate good cooking.
By the time you wrangle her back to your bitchin' new truck, that nerd fucking died or went into a coma or something. The coroner will rule it as a suicide, just look at the trajectory of the entry wound.
"Give me a hand, toots!"
At your command, the frightened woman drags and dumps the stiff out of the car and into the street.
Mhmm. Yup. That's gonna leave a stain. Girls don't appreciate pleather, either, so she luckily won't mind.
She's frozen in fear, so you have to pick her up and throw her into the truck and slam the door, it takes a few tries, after repeatedly clipping her right ankle a bit. She yelps, but you already know those are just crocodile tears.
You enter the F-150 and lock all the doors and activate the master lock, so she can't go anywhere.
Hey, it's got a sunroof! How did you not notice earlier?
You look back at the catatonic cutie and examine her name tag.
"So... 'Tiffany'... If that is your real name... How long have you worked at Alpha Centuari Auto? Ah, nevermind, you probably don't want to talk about work, you just clocked out. You DO like chili cheese Frito boats, right?"
Complete silence. She's just shaking and ignoring you. Pretty rude...
Destination:
>Dump this ungrateful ho off at her house, she doesn't see how hard you're trying to woo her. You deserve better.>A&W's sounds too good to pass up, even if you do get the shits every time. Rootbeer floats and chili boats, here we come!!>You DO still have the $20k you were going to buy the truck with. You could take Tiffany to Cuisine de Chien and spoil her. You'd also be in good company to brag about your new truck. It was expensive. Tell people that.>Tiffany is a modern woman. She doesn't need your money thrown at her, she just needs to see your heart of gold. DiGiorno's it up back at home, and introduce your family to your new girlfriend and truck.>...But does Tiffany have a heart of gold? Let's test her with some charity work. Take the costume of the Great Satan and dress up Tiffany or yourself in it, then visit the Youth Cancer Ward in St. Blarthington's Hospital and entertain the patients. >(WRITE IN)and
>Roll 1d100! 
