[11 / 2 / 8]
Quoted By: >>5790069
USA, 21 century, somewhere in Flyover States…
Ah, good old US of goddamn A! There is no greater country in the whole world, heck, maybe in a whole universe! It was built upon giant balls and shoulders of simple hill-dwellin', tobacco-chewin’, moonshine-brewin', bigcity-disdainin', skeeter-shootin', mamma-lovin', dim-wittin' folks like you. Let those city girly boys look with disgust at your kind, calling them rednecks! Well, screw that idiots, ‘cause without you there would be no stuff that those sissies love. They call you names, such as “yokel”, “hick”, “menace to society", but it is a badge of pride, knowing that you are among the most free people in this god-blessed country! No matter what ATF, IRS,USDA, local sheriff, occasional FBI agents, voices in your head and goddamn “USEED” tells you!
It's almost a night, and you are driving on your truck towards Old Jenkins farm, to do… something.
Now, tell me, what kind of ‘neck are you?:
> Weird ‘neck (Someone saw a bloody skinwalker near Jeninkin’s Farm, and you're gonna shoot it! Oh, and take photos of it)
> Wasted ‘neck (You are almost sober, but Jenkins has the best ‘shine in these parts.)
> Brutal ‘neck (Damn coyotes are getting bold, they even mauled Jenkin's chickens, so you're gonna show those varmints who’s the boss!)
> Shifty ‘neck (You are going to Jenkin’s farm to do… stuff. Away from prying eyes of sheriff)
> Crafty ‘neck (Your latest invention is lacking extra “oomph”, and Jenkin’s ‘shine is a potent rocket fuel)
> Hardworking ‘neck (Believe it or not, but are actually on a job, and it takes to Jenkin’s Farm.)
> Young ‘neck (You are hoping to get more closely “acquainted” with Jenkin’s granddaughter.)
And what are you doing for a living? Sure, being a hot-blooded PATRIOT is a noble profession, but, sadly, it ain't paying bills.
> Trucker (You drive big-rigs around the country, but right now you are off-duty, just chilling. Despite that, however, you are the master behind every wheel, be it a car or a boat or something else.)
> Mechanic (You are an integral part of a local community, and can fix pretty much everything. And you about to prove it to anyone by using only trusty toolbox, duct-tape and a little of a prayer.)
> Farmer (Yes. The actual farmer. Raising crops, ranching herds, the whole shebang. You are a jack of all trades as your job is to be self-sufficient as much as possible.)
> write-in
Oh right, I forgot to ask your name, you glorious bastard. What Do they call you, you red-necked salt of the Earth?
> write-in
Ah, good old US of goddamn A! There is no greater country in the whole world, heck, maybe in a whole universe! It was built upon giant balls and shoulders of simple hill-dwellin', tobacco-chewin’, moonshine-brewin', bigcity-disdainin', skeeter-shootin', mamma-lovin', dim-wittin' folks like you. Let those city girly boys look with disgust at your kind, calling them rednecks! Well, screw that idiots, ‘cause without you there would be no stuff that those sissies love. They call you names, such as “yokel”, “hick”, “menace to society", but it is a badge of pride, knowing that you are among the most free people in this god-blessed country! No matter what ATF, IRS,USDA, local sheriff, occasional FBI agents, voices in your head and goddamn “USEED” tells you!
It's almost a night, and you are driving on your truck towards Old Jenkins farm, to do… something.
Now, tell me, what kind of ‘neck are you?:
> Weird ‘neck (Someone saw a bloody skinwalker near Jeninkin’s Farm, and you're gonna shoot it! Oh, and take photos of it)
> Wasted ‘neck (You are almost sober, but Jenkins has the best ‘shine in these parts.)
> Brutal ‘neck (Damn coyotes are getting bold, they even mauled Jenkin's chickens, so you're gonna show those varmints who’s the boss!)
> Shifty ‘neck (You are going to Jenkin’s farm to do… stuff. Away from prying eyes of sheriff)
> Crafty ‘neck (Your latest invention is lacking extra “oomph”, and Jenkin’s ‘shine is a potent rocket fuel)
> Hardworking ‘neck (Believe it or not, but are actually on a job, and it takes to Jenkin’s Farm.)
> Young ‘neck (You are hoping to get more closely “acquainted” with Jenkin’s granddaughter.)
And what are you doing for a living? Sure, being a hot-blooded PATRIOT is a noble profession, but, sadly, it ain't paying bills.
> Trucker (You drive big-rigs around the country, but right now you are off-duty, just chilling. Despite that, however, you are the master behind every wheel, be it a car or a boat or something else.)
> Mechanic (You are an integral part of a local community, and can fix pretty much everything. And you about to prove it to anyone by using only trusty toolbox, duct-tape and a little of a prayer.)
> Farmer (Yes. The actual farmer. Raising crops, ranching herds, the whole shebang. You are a jack of all trades as your job is to be self-sufficient as much as possible.)
> write-in
Oh right, I forgot to ask your name, you glorious bastard. What Do they call you, you red-necked salt of the Earth?
> write-in
