[20 / 3 / 7]
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You shifted your attention away from the imprints in the sand, to the meandering haze, scrutinising it for any minute wavers or deeper shades within. “What are you doing?” Lyrebird scoffed, pushing you with her shoulder as she walked past. You gathered and spat. “Keeping an eye out for Papoose. She might be lurking out there, lining up a shot at me,” you said, leading the barrel and the sights a complete circle. Kneeling beside the axe, Lyrebired paused with her hand hovering inches above the steel. “I’ve done told you that ain’t what she’s after. If it were, she’d have dropped you when you were knocked out.” “Likely are the chances that she can trail the bracelet, not me. And you’re the one who had it on.” You took aim and fired a warning shot towards the vague horizon, the mist echoing the gunshot. “You hiding in there, Papoose?!” you yelled. “Eyeballing me this very moment? Show yourself if so!” Goodwin startled, retreating a step as he looked down your revolver. Lyrebird flinched, too, looking at you over her shoulder. “Don’t give me such a start again, ‘Only Dead’ Aug. Leastways, holler a warning first” she said. “You are just being paranoid.” “You ain’t being paranoid enough,” you said. “One deadly shot’s all it takes to damn me, and be her ticket out of here. You can’t put faith in her nor her words with those odds.” Lyrebired picked up the axe, shaking her head and then lifting it off. “You’d still be worth something as a Judged, still got some use left in you after”, she said. “So, you see her?” You narrowed your eyes, scanning the mist again. “Nah. I don’t. If she’s in yonder, she’s hiding it well.” “There’s some scribbling here,” she said, as if ignoring you. She lifted it closer. “It reads, and I quote: ‘Stout is the truth; deceit's all hollow. Round up the tinder, stack it higher, To find the answer in the pale fire.’” You scrubbed your beard with the cylinder, pondering. A moment after, you spoke, “I ain’t wise to no ‘pale fires’, but it looks like we’re being nudged to speak honest.” “Speak honest?” Lyrebired echoed. “What kind of truth does it want?” She rose to her feet, cracking a knee bone. “I reckon, a truth that ain’t meant for either of you to know?” Goodwin looked at her, a mixture of confusion and loss in his eyes; you shrugged. Lyrebired turned to the axe. “Goodwin, we ain’t wed, not afore or since.” She locked eyes—her blue fires—with him. “I scarce knew you before coming here, and I came here after. I never minded you calling me your wife, still don’t. You words were how you enjoyed life here, like the saloon’s luckiest crapshooter, said you found the Down Below more entertaining than the living world. You agreed to help me track down my daughters, and if they were to forgive me, ever, we’d settle here together, the four of us.”
YouAndYourWaifu !!S7iWoz56vJi
YouAndYourWaifu !!S7iWoz56vJi ID:c1z7M+Q5 Fri 05 Jan 2024 12:46:39 No. 5882741 Report With her final bewitched word, a log appeared above the sandy circle—akin to gold atop the miner’s seconds-ago-empty pan—from the humid air, suspended just within her grasp. Without delay, she split it with the axe, the blade cutting through, slicing the log into several pieces, breaking no chips or shavings and finding no knots to stop it. As if no longer spellbound, and again bound by gravity, they fell on the ground, on top of each other, tumbling together with a timber clatter. However, there was no seeming fire. Goodwin looked at the pile, and then back at Lyrebird. “I spoke those words? I liked it here?” he asked, looking around. “I find it hard to believe, miss.” Lyrebired nodded, then sighed. “Reckon you might, but I ain’t got the time to be fibbing here. This axe here would be no use if I told falsehood.” “Your turn,” she said, extending the axe by its handle. “Share a secret with us, ‘Only Dead’ Aug.”> Speak the unvarnished truth about how you got here. You’re not akin to the others,; a lass and her bullet have cursed you, and now you're in pursuit of an escape. You're not one of the damned. > Confess to the way you spent the bounty you got from her head. For it, you got a clean shave, mended your jacket, drank a ton, frequented a brothel, and purchased some snake oil. The worth if her life, that was about it. > She can keep the axe. Ask Lyrebird to confess the reason she took the lives of her two daughters, and why guilt now drives her to seek them out. > [Write In]
YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi
YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi ID:c1z7M+Q5 Fri 05 Jan 2024 12:47:42 No. 5882742 Report Quoted By:
___________________________
> UPDATES? Once a day.
> PREVIOUS THREADS? https://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive.html?tags=Wanted%20Dead:%20A%20Western%20Quest > OTHER QUESTS? https://pastebin.com/raw/4sBYKVqL > I welcome any additional comments or thoughts along with a selected prompt if you have any. YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi
YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi ID:c1z7M+Q5 Fri 05 Jan 2024 12:48:58 No. 5882744 Report Quoted By:
___________________________ <span class="mu-s">Possessions:</span> Pricey Revolver: Custom-built, with pearl grip just for your hand, a hair-trigger suited to your style, all polished up, engraved, and maintained proper. Cost a fortune. Pocketsfull of Feeble Iron: Feeble as their namesake, your pockets are full up with Graveyard’s iron. Forged with desire they are made into bullets or whatnot. You scrounged up enough to keep the bullets flying for a good spell. Goldie’s Pocket Watch: Manifested from Usher’s nail he gifted to the brat, it is a brass, gold and silver vest timepiece with a portrait of Goldie’s brother Henry inside. The hour pointer of it singles out Henry, while the minute pointer lays claim to Goldie. Ashen Skeleton: Marrow turned as black as the ace of spades after you had a drink from some watermill’s waters. It clings to your soul, keeping the ghostly flesh and bones knit together even when they’d normally split. You figure there’s a limit to the hurt it can bear, ashen bones or no, but you ain’t found it yet. It fades with the passing days, leaving troubles in its wake. “Life’s Gasps” Cigarette: Slim whiff wrapped up in glinting gold. Perry's “reward” to you from his self-imposed gamble for returning from El Dorado sound and well. Says when you touch it to your lips, it sparks up on its own, giving the fella smoking it a chance to have a gander at the living world for a spell: 'bout a nickel's worth of time. Grit&Sour Chew A sliver of chewing tobacco, possessing the knack to turn soul’s aches into tart sting. Every lingering agony gets its own distinct vile flavour when chewed on, and barters one for another, should a soul and stomach be stout enough to handle the bargain. Feeble Iron Revolver: Revolver lifted from Goodwin's belt, borrowed, not stolen. There weren’t a spare moment to count the number of bullets in the chamber, so you don’t know how many there are.
YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi
YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi ID:c1z7M+Q5 Fri 05 Jan 2024 12:49:59 No. 5882746 Report Quoted By:
___________________________ <span class="mu-s">Pains:</span> Right Shoulder Wound: A mark left by Goldie’s shot, Lucifer’s Lead binds you to this here Graveyard Frontier. Your right arm doesn’t take kindly to any other Lucifer Lead bullet in reach of it. Prickling Pain: Induced from some devilish cactus, Prickly Niceties, they call ‘em. Their needles left a stinging ache from their bite in your ghostly flesh that don’t let up, even long after you shook ‘em off. Thirst: The thirst comes on quick and there ain’t much to drink, water or alcohol, to take the edge off. It’s parching pain that Prickly Niceties brought on you, grates your throat raw, and only eases up for a spell after you find a swig. Gashed Palms: Cut up by the rusty blades of some windmill you had to crank, both your palms burn like they’re fresh wound. Shard Stabbing Pain: The aftermath of that feeble stone blowing up the entire chamber. It’s like thousand tiny needles piercing your ghost flesh, a relentless, agonising hurt. Left Shoulder Wound: A lead bite left by “Charred Bone’s” shot buried deep in your left shoulder. The wound's sealed up, but the hurt blazes like a prairie fire. Mauled Wrist: A ragged hunk of your wrist that was torn off by the scorched charred spectre left in Cassidy's leftovers. Wolves’ Frayed Scar: Cutting fiercer and biting harder than any splinters from the El Dorado are the gashes on your back carved by them hellish wolves' talons and the tears from their devilish maws. Blasted Hand: An agonising sear inflicted by Lyrebird shattered your wrist joint clean with her unholy rifle, not through gunpowder or lead, but by an eruption of exploding heat.
Anonymous
I'm sorry your quest died. You seemed really committed too.
YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi
YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi ID:c1z7M+Q5 Sat 06 Jan 2024 11:12:05 No. 5883423 Report >>5882846 Yeah, I guess that's it. It's okay. It's my fault for not being consistent and taking long breaks. I can't really force people to read and participate, nor would I want to. I guess I'll try something else.
Anonymous
>>5883423 I'm still playing (was just doing other stuff last night to unwind from work, and didn't notice the uodate), but perhaps if you'd rather end it here I need not vote? I have quite enjoyed the quest so far, but I know running for one anon can be a bit weird.
I have some constructive criticism of why I think readership dropped off, if you'd like it?
Anonymous
>>5882741 >Confess that the veneer of honor and justice you wore as a bounty hunter was just an excuse to do the only thing you were good at, but knew was sinful and bad, in pursuit of money: killing This would have been my vote, btw
YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi
YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi ID:c1z7M+Q5 Sat 06 Jan 2024 20:01:49 No. 5883707 Report >>5883687 Thank you for playing and sticking around. I'm glad that you've enjoyed the story so far. I wouldn't mind running for one player, but it's a big ask and burden for the one, and a big responsibility of picking the prompts, and I don't want to put it that on you. So it would be awkward for the both of us.
Perhaps it's best to end it here, as I can only get two players at best.
I have my own likely guesses as to why people have dropped, but I would be more than happy to hear out your constructive criticism.
>>5883697 Interesting Write-In. I would say August wasn't considering it sinful because of the legitimacy, real or not, of the bounty poster. It says wanted dead, and so he didn't do anything wrong.
Anonymous
>>5883707 >I would say August wasn't considering it sinful because of the legitimacy, real or not, of the bounty poster. It says wanted dead, and so he didn't do anything wrong. My vote would have been to reveal that as a cope, and thus develop the character a bit. After all, NOW he knows that frontier violence damns people to a terrible fate. When he was 'just doing his job' in the living world, he was sending people to this awful hell-dimension, and now his previous acts are cast in a whole other light.
>constructive criticism That's part of it, I think: neither of our deuteragonists have really developed or advanced closer to their goals in a tangible way. Aug and Goldie still hate each other, have no new friends (until recently, if Lyrebird and Cholera-Girl count), or are any closer to besting one another, finding Henry, or escaping the Frontier. Anons like, and expect to see, some form of incremental progress after a post or two, as a way to keep them motivated to continue and press on. if the characters aren't growing in power, developing emotionally or in their relationships, or getting closer to a stated goal in an obvious way, people lose motivation.
I think you did a spectacular (like, REALLY good) job developing all the 'attractions' (or horrors, really) of the Graveyard Frontier, and I love how so many are drawn on Old West myths, indigenous faith, or cryptid mythology and such, as well as familiar cowboy movie iconography like wells, windmills, saloons, and prospector-mines. However, another things /qst/ anons in particular seem to love is exploring and 'mastering' a concept or setting element... That is, really getting to grips with and understanding the nature of a fantastical mystery or resource. We kept acquiring new, unusual items (the cubes, the 1-up cigarettes, the black water, the devil-bullet) but they were always in such short supply that we didn't really get to PLAY with them -- we held onto them until, in desperation, we used up whatever we had and then no longer had a chance to try it out a second time.
I also really think you're good at evoking sensation and communicating the complexities of movement and of subtle gestures,. It's really neat and distinctive in all your quests. However, if you focus a bit too much it can make quick exchanges and scenes very complex and lengthy, which can drag out pacing of an update or distract from the bigger picture events or a more holistic understanding of what exactly is happening in a given scene and what the stakes are.
[C]
Anonymous
>>5883732 All these good and bad elements really compounded with the "trapped in a series of dream-deaths" segment last thread, as we were treading water and literally incapable of progressing, indulging in a bunch of heretofore-unseen NPCs' last moments in a hallucination instead of making tangible progress or advancing Aug's own growth, and there didn't seem to be any stakes or goals that we could easily attain beyond "keep dying, keep trying not to die, wait for this to stop." We got lots of cool set-dressing and descriptions of interactions, but no reason to get invested in it, and no forward momentum with characters, items, setting elements, or relationships we really cared about.
Anonymous
>>5882741 > Confess to the way you spent the bounty you got from her head. For it, you got a clean shave, mended your jacket, drank a ton, frequented a brothel, and purchased some snake oil. The worth if her life, that was about it. YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi
YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi ID:c1z7M+Q5 Sun 07 Jan 2024 13:51:56 No. 5884589 Report >>5883732 >>5883737 >My vote would have been to reveal that as a cope, and thus develop the character a bit. After all, NOW he knows that frontier violence damns people to a terrible fate. When he was 'just doing his job' in the living world, he was sending people to this awful hell-dimension, and now his previous acts are cast in a whole other light. I can see him considering that, not sure about voicing or confessing it out loud however, especially to Lyrebird. But the truth does weight on his mind.
>constructive criticism Thank you. That’s a lot of stuff to take into consideration, and to ponder over.
Because of votes and choices, August and Goldie ended up separated and we ended up in a situation where they couldn’t really develop their relationship further after that. With this quest, and Graveyard Frontier, my intention was for the situation and surroundings to always be unclear and confusing and for the players to feel lost and unprepared, just like Aug. I can guess that I had managed to do that, but you are correct that “mastering” the Graveyard Frontier was not something I was even considering players trying to do, instead of being happy to just manage to find progress from one objective to another. In this story, August was supposed to be no more than a visitor, only witnessing and interacting with, at most, 10% of the Graveyard Frontier, and for him and the players to always be on edge. August grew through the quest in his knowledge of the frontier, but I guess it was too minuscule.
My mistake seems to be that we are 70k words in, and August is aware of what to avoid, but has no concrete way or goal to pursue an escape—he should’ve found it way earlier.
I can see now how being forced to always be distrusting and not being let to make friends could be something players wouldn’t enjoy, though that also was the theme and atmosphere I was going for. A limited inventory of one-use but cool items doesn’t allow for experimentation, and just like you mentioned, only forces people to hold onto them.
I was looking forward to the nightmare scenario, but it didn’t work out as well as I expected, with no risk until it was done, being way too confusing, and not revealing much about the outlaws August had killed. It also followed after Goldie’s thread, so about two months of us being stuck without any visible progress.
I’m happy that I had managed to deliver the atmosphere and horror of the Graveyard Frontier and stay true to the genre; as well as characters feeling real in their body language.
I can see it becoming overburdening, and I’ll need to work on that.
>>5884338 I appreciate the vote.
YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi
YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi ID:c1z7M+Q5 Thu 11 Jan 2024 00:01:26 No. 5887504 Report Now I'm not sure what idea to go with (and do it better) but I'll come back with another quest for sure ...
Anonymous
Quoted By:
>>5884589 Don't take it too hard, QM. You're a trooper, and I've been enjoying this quest consistently for the whole time you've run it.
>>5887504 I await it eagerly!
Anonymous
>>5887504 I strongly suggest that your next quest MC be a cute girl or at least put one in the OP image. Cheap trick but it works.
Anonymous
>>5912657 Don't listen to this faggot.
Anonymous
YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi
YouAndYourWaifuFAQ !!S7iWoz56vJi ID:3SQuMzbd Sat 03 Feb 2024 19:37:41 No. 5914087 Report Quoted By: