>>6035867>>6036004>>6036021>>6036064>>6036089>>6036102>>6036106>>You are a lawyer>>>Difficulty: NIGHTMAREYou nervously laugh and say, "I know some of you might be upset about what happened in court, but let's not dwell on the past. How about we focus on new beginnings, you know, like a group of dangerous criminals and their former state-assigned lawyer?"
The serial killer recognizes you first. He sneers, "That's the idiot they assigned as my lawyer! I had five consecutive life sentences, and then that idiot opened his mouth and I ended up with ten!"
You gulp. "Well, everyone has a bad day. Let's all look at the bright side; you're free now, instead of in jail."
The school shooter shouts angrily, "You are the worst lawyer ever! I had a perfectly solid case for self-defense, and you ruined it by being a moron!"
You sigh. "Dude, you shot fifth graders. It's really hard to argue that was self-defense. THAT ONE was definitely not my fault."
The school shooter snorts. "Sounds like something someone who has never been swarmed by fifth graders would say."
You turn to the cannibal psychiatrist. "Back me here, Mister Lecter. We're cool, right? You said you would never eat me—"
The cannibal psychiatrist grimaces. "I said I wouldn't eat you because I am not in the habit of eating literal garbage."
You sigh. "That's incredibly hurtful, Mister Lecter. Herr mass murderer, do you have anything to add?"
The 135-year-old German man who had been living in Argentina but was finally arrested after you bungled up his case looks at you balefully. He curses, "Du bist noch schlimmer als die Juden (you are even worse than the Jews)!"
>Embrace the End.>>You sigh deeply and say, "Alright, let's just get this over with. Who's first to kill me? No need to drag this out.">Attempt Escape>>You look around frantically before declaring, "I'm out of here! Catch me if you can, suckers!" and bolt into the jungle.>The Chewbacca Defense>>You adopt a serious tone and say, "Alright, Chewbacca is a Wookie from the planet Kashyyyk. If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must let me go. The defense rests.">Pretend to Be One of Them>>"Guys, I'm actually a vile, soulless criminal too! Really! I'm just like you, only with a suit and briefcase!">Play Dead>>"Maybe if I play dead, they’ll leave me alone." You collapse to the ground, eyes closed.>Start a Sing-Along>>"Let's all calm down with a sing-along. How about 'Kumbaya'? Everyone loves 'Kumbaya'!">Desperate Bargain>>You use the same tactic you had used to graduate law school. "Look, if you let me live, I will suck you off! I will even swallow!">write in 
