im not happy with my life, i will try posting in this thread to try and contain my retardation and blog posting so i don't bother people on other boards anymore

i will start off by saying that i thoroughly despise who i am. i look in the mirror and hate whats staring back at me. im too much of a coward to kill myself though, so im stuck in a perpetual limbo of self loathing/suicidal ideation, hurting people that i care about, then back to the ideation. i just want it to stop.