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Im playing pokemon platinum.
> all my mons are dead except my physically and emotionally damaged vespiquen.
> in pokemon centre. Before healing my mons I decide to fight an unassuming "tv idol" npc standing next to the check out.
> immediately feel my spidey sense tingling
> thers a crackle of electricity from my ds and the walls of my room start to quake.
> mfw
> npc sends out the manliest clefairy you could ever hope to see.
> Massive clefairy peen. Fedora. Stubble. Must be russian: it's holding a tree trunk overhead in one hand. Dragging its hulking scrotum with the other. Pixilated Vodka bottles on the floor. Must have inherited stalin's monster stauche
>it's 10 levels lower than my vespique.
> challengeaccepted.png
> the time is 12pm on the dot. High noon. wild west draw music playing. We go on 3.
> i steady my breathing and count "1"
> i hear "2" from my neighbors next door.
> Trump is on tv. Looks me dead in the eye and says "3"
> We draw..
> vespiquen goes first. Attack Order.
> thatsalottadamage.gif
> ... Nani?
> Clefairy is still standing.
> 2hp. Stroking his mountainous cock
> Unflinching. Clefairy spits out a single bloody tooth and steps closer.
> Vespiquen finna peace tf out, but Clefairy sausage in the way
> Clefairy stops right in front of my towering queen. The ground begins to shake. Clefairy's dick begins winding up, as if preparing to strike with the force of every cannon in Stalingrad.
> "The foe's CLEFAIRY used METRONOME!"
> Saitama-Clefairy struck with the force of anime teenager highschooler version of Mike Tyson.
> Maybe I didn't see the other words on my screen. Maybe I didn't want to. Maybe the game itseld wanted to spare me the irrelevancies. I see only the following words.
> "Ice Punch" "Super Effective" "Critical hit" "Frozen"
Cont.
