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>be a manchild @ 20
>only one in my family that tries to tackle problems without ignoring shit and try to learn more about things
>still struggling
>2nd year at community college
>graduate in a year
>barely any plans after that
>school ended 10 days ago after a gruesome finals week
>passed all finals but still feel bad since i don't think there's a future for me
>2.5gpa wtf am i doing
>have things i want to do but motivation is so low and really depressed
>unstable job, still haven't gotten any hours
>never learned how to drive
>lonely, going to showderp to feel some sense of togetherness
>getting fatter
>wrists are getting weak from typing
>trying to fix all of these problems but instead stay in my room all day staring into nothingness
>dad is depressed like fuck
>stage iv chronic kidney disease
>other health problems
>so lazy he sleeps everyday or just walks around the house
>wants to die
>mom works all the time in a warehouse
>arthritis in her knees, no one to drive her to surgery appointment
>too stubborn to go to the doctor for other things
>she's too stressed
>feel awful
>least thing im doing is doing chores around the house
>feel pathetic
>hate myself for not trying harder to get out of depression and "learned helplessness"
i wish i had somebody to help me push myself...
sorry for somewhat long vent (at least for a casual board
