Hey guys, I need your help with something.
On an Ashley thread sometime back on /v/
>>>/v/273207434 A few pics influenced me to do a story involving 2 WarioWare characters, Young Cricket and Ashley. Although it isn't pokemon related, it seems like these are one of few fanfic generals that might seem to have good/knowledged people outside of /lit/ that I can go to. Another problem I'm facing is that I'm not a frequent writer, as I only did my first story about a year ago.
For this Young Cricket x Ashley idea, I want to take it at a far better angle than my old story, so I was hoping if you guys can point out all/anything wrong with my first story and suggest things to help improve my writing.
So far, I only know is that the greentext has to go.
http://pastebin.com/RN6YV2vH It is somewhat NSFW, though the NSFW isn't in good detail since it isn't my focus
