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first, she's dumb and she likes you. you have to hit her across the face after you beat her in battle. when doing so, you must tell her that this is for her own good. when she cries out, "why??!?" as she tries to get up, looking at the person who should thought would have never done this, push her down with your dominant foot -- no kicking because that would be too much. tell her she is utter shit and too weak at this pokemon thing so she needs someone to guide her in her journey. tell her that you don't know why sycamore chose her and that he was probably on drugs when he chose her, and tell her that sycamore probably chose her because he needed at least one idiot for his research -- after that, tell her that she needs you to prove him wrong. when walking away, tell her that she needs to pretty up because she looks ugly and pathetic. while she's down there, sobbing her eyes out, quickly turn back, drag her back up by her shirt, and hold her closely while looking straight into her eyes and say, "i'm doing this because i like you, you filthy, brown squirrel." give her a long, clean lick with your tongue up her left cheek and leave. she will be yours after that.
