So I'm writing a kink heavy bisexual non-con BDSM fic about a secret club where powerful trainers get to do degenerate shit to other trainers and it was originally meant to be a quick one shot. But my rough draft ended up becoming 4 chapters with nearly 20k words.
I'm currently about one third of the way done with the second draft of the first chapter and I'd like some feedback on my writing style since I don't want to spend all this time writing all this shit just to find out I can't describe shit as well as I thought I could.
Here's what I have of the second draft of the first chapter:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1VeGtKo_sZULacldJeApGBLzCSs-Q0SudFvs9e3IgkhY/edit?usp=sharingMostly what I want to know is if my descriptions of these scenes are painting a good enough picture and not leaving any big holes. Also some feedback on the pacing would be nice. Any other feedback in addition to those two things is also welcome
Here's the rough draft of the first chapter:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1OzNB55_SE8gumH2SCN0HAXOnmFUFzNbkhezcRILiq-Q/edit?usp=sharingIt has a ton of issues. Especially in pacing but that's what multiple drafts are for. Not looking for any feedback on this anyway since I already had a few people look it over. I'm just linking it in case someone wants to compare it to the second draft.
DISCLAIMER: It includes pegging, bisexuality, light genital torture, rape and other sorts of degeneracy that falls under that umbrella.
