>>28530254>Have you heard about that happened to Azure Shore?I think you meant "what"
> The Grass-type had been frozen in place by Stoutland’s statement that she couldn’t fight anything, as it made her feel once again like she was useless, making her pause as her anxiety and fears gripped her again.Passively, and awkwardly worded; make it active and restructure. I have an idea, but use whatever you think works out best: "She felt useless. The Stoutland's words had paralyzed her, and the old fear and anxiety she'd left at the stairs was upon her once again."
> She stared down the tunnel, her eyes frozen on the last spot she had seen Stoutland, her body rooted to the spot where Stoutland had left her.Said spot twice; recommend changing it up.
>I’m better at attacking physically than specially, but still, maybe it was a good thing that I used it.You're telling rather than showing here - and you do this in a few different sections of the latter half of this work. The source material does demand a degree of "hey this is X and it does Y thing," but you should do all you can to help minimize statements like these and instead work them more fluidly into dialogue, description and action.
The latter half of this chapter, particularly the last few paragraphs, starts to suffer from adverbs, passive voice, and some awkward phrasing. Stoutland's internal struggle in particular needs work I think - it is on the cusp of feeling genuine. Otherwise, you're doing fine, write on.
