>>26864843>Alright, one big thing: Unless the story is in first person, you should avoid addressing the reader as much as possible (Line 3).I see. But I just thought giving the narrator some tiny hint of personality. You know give it some emotions. I guess you could say I was inspired by The tale of Despxrauxe's (you know the little mice that uses a needle as his sword?) narrator.
>I also noticed that you seem to switch between the past and/or present in terms of your verbs. You should try to stick to one of these tenses for your sentences (past is usually recommended)>Pokemon is both a singular and plural noun, so having an s next to it (Pokemons, line 14, there may be more) is not necessary.>Since the characters were already introduced, saying what species they are (lines 26-28) is not needed. Thank you for your advice! I'll try my best to improve on my next chapter. Thank you.
I just drew a Male Florges with a bow. It's ok. But nothing good or anything 