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I never had any friends when I was kid, so I gave myself imaginary friends. Then in middle school I tried to confess to a girl, but spilled all the spaghetti about my imaginary friends, causing her to instantly think I'm freaky. I ran away crying and sperged out. Afterwards I lashed out against my imaginary friends, permanently killed all of them except one. Me and her are still friends to this day, and I still have yet to make any actual friends or have a girlfriend.
tl;dr I'm a schizo